In many countries it is now illegal to advertise alcohol. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #alcohol

Adverts for beer, wine and spirits are now banned in many nations.

This

essay agrees with

this

idea because drinking can lead to serious health and social problems and advertisers can often influence

people

drink

Correct your spelling

than

show examples

then

they should. Advertising alcoholic drinks should be banned because alcohol is harmful to a person's health. Drinking too

many

Correct quantifier usage

much

show examples

causes several conditions including liver cancer, diabetes and brain damage.

This

puts a huge strain on the health service and not only causes suffering to the patients

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

to their families.

For example

, Russia had a huge problem with alcoholism and many men were dying from alcohol-related diseases, but after they decided to stop companies promoting alcoholic beverages on TV and in print ads, it resulted in a huge reduction in

such

cases. Another reason why the promotion of alcohol should be prohibited is the

the

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

fact that it influences

people

unfairly to buy that product. The main goal of any advertising campaign is to sell more and

this

could be seen as irresponsible considering the harm drinking can do. Commercials often make certain

drink

brands look cool or sexy, in order to sway potential customers, and do not actually talk about the dangers.

For example

, Hennessy adverts often portray a handsome man in a luxurious setting, drinking cognac with a beautiful woman.

However

, it should be noted that warnings are often put at the end of these ads warning

people

drink

responsibly. In conclusion, alcohol is a hazardous product and advertisers should not be allowed to try and convince

people

drink

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

therefore

believe that more countries should ban the advertising of liquor.

Submitted by siraj.hv on Mon Sep 26 2022

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

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A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

276 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countries it is now illegal to advertise alcohol. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Ambition is a positive quality for people to have in society today. How important is it for people who want to succeed in life? Is it a positive or negative characteristic?

The picture depicts how Islip town centre planned development.

Due to the rapid development and expansion of supermarkets in some countries many small, local businesses are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local businesses will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others belive that some imformation is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

At present, science is developing quickly, but some people still have a high opinion of artists. What can the arts tell us of life that science cannot?