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Band 5

It is a natural process for animal spaces to become extinct. There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#process #spaces #reason #people
Many people claim that animal species
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 extinct, it is a natural occurrence. No one
try
Change the verb form
tries
show examples
 to prevent
this
 from happening. It is my understanding that it will be harmful up to
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
 but would be beneficial under some circumstances. I will explicate some logical
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 to support my point of view. Commence with views of disagreement, it is observed that many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
animals
Change the noun form
animal
show examples
 species become vanished is due to
negligence
Correct article usage
the negligence
show examples
 of human beings. Like dinosaurs was completely finished because of the volcanic eruptions that
goes
Change the verb form
go
show examples
 climate change and these change may occur due to the heat increase on
earth
Add an article
the earth
show examples
. In a survey conducted by
forest
Correct article usage
the forest
show examples
department
Add a comma
,department
show examples
 it was found that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 in
future
Add a comma
,future
show examples
 many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other animal types become lost because of the increase in
temperature
Correct article usage
the temperature
show examples
 of Earth.
For example
,
butterfly
Add an article
the butterfly
a butterfly
show examples
 is
completed
Replace the word
completely
show examples
 dead due to the increase of chlorofluorocarbon gas which is produced by air conditioner and refrigerators.
Shifted
Wrong verb form
Shifting
show examples
 to WhatsApp you
of
Add a missing verb
are of
show examples
 agreement some
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 believe that it is a natural process for animal types
become
Fix the infinitive
to become
show examples
 extinct because
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
 ancient
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
, there was no device which heat can produce. Even that time when you of animal kinds was finished.
Secondly
, people should try to prevent
this
 from happening like they do not hunt
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
animal. Because of hunting many
animals
 become vanished and do not cut trees because trees are
Add an article
the house
a house
show examples
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
 of many
animals
. So they have to preserve the animal species. To conclude
this
, I agree with the given statement because
food
Correct article usage
the food
show examples
 chain
is
Change to the active voice
also happens
has also happened
show examples
also
 happened in the
world wide
Correct your spelling
worldwide
show examples
 forest. So, many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
animals
 become extinct after
sometime
Replace the word
some time
show examples
. That's why it's a natural process.
Submitted by poonam.chaudhary0099 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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