Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There has been discussion revolving around the issue of whether
museums
are a
place
where
people
get educated or it is an amusing
place
to get entertained. I tend to believe that
exhibition
Correct article usage
the exhibition
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
should be a
place
of education. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will explain my opinion. The primary factor we need to take into consideration is that
museums
are tourist’s biggest attraction
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
place
.
For example
,
people
who come to visit any country tend to stop by the
museums
to be entertained. It is that because places like
this
manage to put exhibitions that are interesting or somehow
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
appealing to the customers.
Moreover
, it is a perfect
place
to entertain
children
.
For example
, it sparks
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
curiosity and
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
them to be excited for school. It is for
the
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
reason that
museums
are predisposed to have exhibitions that keep
children
interested.
In contrast
, some others may claim that
museums
Change noun form
museums'
museum's
show examples
goal is to educate. To start with,
children
or adults who are going to
museums
learn about different cultures,
historical
Correct word choice
and historical
show examples
events and it can develop the perfect mindset for young
people
which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
sympathize or identify with other
people
. Another argument can be made that it allows
people
to find their interests in life through authentic demonstrations that are held in
museums
. Having considered both views I believe that
museums
are beneficial for educational purpose because it helps to find yourself and
ne
Correct your spelling
new
interests which can lead to expanding your mind and worldview later on in life.
Submitted by oimigle on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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