IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Someone says that job satisfaction is more important than job security, but others disagree. Discuss both views and address which one do you agree.

#someone #job #satisfaction #security #address
In the contemporary era, most pupils believe that
job
 contentment is more important than
job
 safety.
However
, others believe vice versa of
this
 notion.According to my perception , both play an equal role in order to achieve long-term success. I will discuss both notions and substantiate my view in the course of the essay. To commence with, there is a myriad of reasons which are in a favour of
job
 satisfaction. Effective growth of the
company
 is the most highlighted point. For instance, if a person is highly satisfied with his profession , he /she comes up with brilliant ideas because they are interested in his/ her field.
This
 will result in the collection of thoughts put together and make a different model which leads to a famed
company
 among others.
For example
, a survey conducted in 2017 proved an Apple
company
 inserts new features in their devices and launches them in the market every year because of the creative mind of employees working in an institution who have a lot of experience to think technical ideas and
this
 is the reason why it is evergreen
company
 and trend will be going on in the future as well.
On the other hand
, there are a lot of concerns which support business security.
Firstly
, to maintain a work-life balance in
this
 hectic scheduled era. A person who is working in an organization with a fixed schedule
then
 maybe he is not that creative but he manages work and life wonderfully.
Moreover
, due to the particular routine, he has not had to worry about income which results in stress-free life from work and spending quality time with his family. In conclusion, there are numerous advantages of both notions. As
job
 satisfaction gives an opportunity to explore the brain and give the fullest for a high success rate. whereas, career security helps in enjoying burden free life and becomes a mode of permanent income.
Submitted by MANPREET130KAUR on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: