IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The availability of unhealthy food, such as fast food and junk food, has become more widespread in recent years. What are some of the problems associated with this development and what action can be taken to solve them?

#availability #food #junk #years #development #action
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is believed by many that there is a significant increment in terms of availability of meals that are detrimental to well-being,
for instance
Linking Words
, fast
food
Use synonyms
 and
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
. I am a strong advocate of
this
Linking Words
 statement as I
also
Linking Words
 believe
this
Linking Words
 trend has risen some severe concerns regarding the well-being of society. There is no denying that fast
food
Use synonyms
 has become one of the favourite foods of
this
Linking Words
 generation yet it has a lot of health concerns to consider. Restaurants that are selling them are rising every day at every corner of any city.
People
Use synonyms
 are so busy nowadays that they don't have the time to prepare a meal by themselves so consuming fast
food
Use synonyms
 is a much quicker option for them. Influenced by social media marketing,
this
Linking Words
 fast
food
Use synonyms
 industry is booming every day and it is getting more and more popular. Five years before there were a significantly lower number of restaurants available for fast
food
Use synonyms
 but things changed rapidly in the cities. The notion was aided
further
Linking Words
 because of the mixing of multi-cuisine in the fast
food
Use synonyms
 industry. In terms of concerns,
firstly
Linking Words
 it must be mentioned that
people
Use synonyms
 are becoming habituated to a more unhealthy
diet
Use synonyms
 and
this
Linking Words
 is taking a great toll on them. Children and young
people
Use synonyms
, who need more vitamins and nutrition, don't feel interested in vegetables and fruits whereas they continue to consume
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
 every day. Several dangerous indications,
for example
Linking Words
, obesity, weak bone structure, and low stamina are seen quite frequently among
Add an article
the
a
show examples
nation
Fix the agreement mistake
nations
show examples
 of different ages.
Secondly
Linking Words
, their
diet
Use synonyms
 is changing more towards outdoor
food
Use synonyms
 whereas they totally ignore the part of preparing
food
Use synonyms
 in the house for themselves. Many doctors have reported that because of
this
Linking Words
 unhealthy trend of regular consumption of
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
, they have discovered many alarming changes among
people
Use synonyms
 of all ages.
Moreover
Linking Words
, to solve the issue from the root, we have to be more considerate about our
food
Use synonyms
 habits by maintaining the nutritional values of our regular
diet
Use synonyms
.
Junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
 can be taken sometimes but not regularly in
such
Linking Words
 a manner that might ruin our health. Government can enforce the vendors to maintain the minimum amount of quality in terms of using unhealthy materials. After all, it is our duty to maintain our
diet
Use synonyms
 for the sake of a healthy and happy life. In conclusion, the expansion of the restaurant chains selling
junk
Use synonyms
food
Use synonyms
 can't be controlled that much but
people
Use synonyms
 can have a strong command over their
diet
Use synonyms
 if they choose to. Maintaining the nutritional value per meal is not only essential but
also
Linking Words
 a must to do if we want to avoid dangerous diseases and lead a happy healthy life.
Submitted by jawadul06 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: