IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #universities #offer #places #students #marks #ages #school
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To pursue the dream of being successful, people always think studying at
university
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 is the only way to
be succeed
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succeed
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. But there is a problem rising among citizens. It is studying at
university
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 is only for
students
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 with flying
marks
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 at
school
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, the others suppose that studying at
university
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 is for everyone at every age despite they are not educated or had a good
perform
Replace the word
performance
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 at
school
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. In m point of view,
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university
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the university
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 is a development area for all
kind
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kinds
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 of people
not
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,not
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 just remarkable
students
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. Having a
widen
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wide
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knowledge
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 before
get
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getting
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 into
university
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 is an advantage for everyone because
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university
Add an article
the university
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 is an academic place,
every
Correct word choice
and every
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 argument or subjects
need
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needs
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 to have the exact information in it. But having flying
marks
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 does not mean having a
widen
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wide
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knowledge
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. The
knowledge
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 at high
school
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 is limited, every student can easily get high
marks
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. But the opposite is true when you are in
university
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.
Knowledge
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 in
university
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 is extremely wide, it is not easy for a person to get maximum points. One more certain thing is teachers in high
school
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 nowadays can help
students
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 increase their
marks
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 so
students
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 can easily get high scores without hard studying. As I mentioned before,
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university
Add an article
the university
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 is an environment for
academic
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academics
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, but not only
academic
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academics
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.
University
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 is
also
Linking Words
 a place to improve lots of life skills. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
 opinion, presentation is the work that every
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students
Change to a singular noun
student
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 in
university
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 have to do once. While presenting, you can both revise the lesson you learned and improve your public speaking skill,
in
Change preposition
apply
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which will help you in finding jobs in future. Another reason is in
university
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, the time you were a freshman you will learn all
basic
Correct article usage
the basic
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 lessons of your career. So having flying
marks
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 at high
school
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 is meaningless
Correct your spelling
because
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
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university
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, you have the same starting point as others. In conclusion, studying at
university
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 is a big chance for anyone who
want
Change the verb form
wants
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 to pursue their career, not just for young
students
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 with
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
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marks
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.
University
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 is a tool for everyone, a short way to get to their dream.
Submitted by trancaomaitrang on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • merit-based
  • competitive environment
  • academic standards
  • innovation
  • diversity
  • mature students
  • equitable
  • inclusive admission policies
  • educational disadvantages
  • holistic admission process
  • extracurricular achievements
  • non-traditional students
  • equal opportunities
  • societal progress
What to do next:
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