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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

A lot of places in the world rely on tourist as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Discuss about the problem solution.

#places #world #tourist #source #income #tourism
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Nowadays, tourism is one of the main industries on the planet and is the biggest source of income for many destinations. sightseer can bring money, culture and job opportunities to the destination, but, unfortunately, they can
also
Linking Words
 be a very big problem for the locals and for the environment. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
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 the biggest problem for a
tourist
Use synonyms
harbor
Change the spelling
harbour
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 is hosting a disrespectful person. When it comes to tourism, the chosen place has to face problems but there are
also
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 a number of solutions.
Firstly
Linking Words
, a
tourist
Use synonyms
 destination in order to not be overpopulated by
Add an article
the visitor
a visitor
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visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 should schedule seasonal incomings, offering limited places for travellers. By doing
this
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 the place can manage easily the
tourist
Use synonyms
 flow.
For instance
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, they should collaborate with
tourist
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 accommodations like hotels to offer a maximum of places during the summer.
Secondly
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, the destination has to increase the presence of authorities on the territory, so they can always check the behaviours of tourists and intervene if something goes wrong. An idea should be to have a bigger number of police during the nightlife outside of the pubs or clubs.
Finally
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, the local government should increase the fines in case of the bad behaviour of the
tourist
Use synonyms
, like damage to an attraction or the pollution of the environment. To conclude, I'm strongly convinced that tourism is and will be a big source of income for many places all around the world.
Nevertheless
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, authorities and
Correct your spelling
accommodation
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 managers should collaborate in order to avoid problems with tourists
Submitted by tommasobelgrano02 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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