IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

All parents want the best opportunity for their children. There some people who think that schools should teach the children skills but others think that having a range of subjects is better for a child’s future. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Correct your spelling
lately
laterly
Correct your spelling
Later
, all
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
 want to be the ideal opportunity for their kids. according to some
people
Use synonyms
 who think that
schools
Use synonyms
 should
Correct your spelling
teach
show examples
tech
Correct your spelling
teach
show examples
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
 different skills but some
people
Use synonyms
 think tank is different
subject
Use synonyms
 is ideal for
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
kids in their practical
life's
Change noun form
life
show examples
.
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 essay should discuss both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
side and
also
Linking Words
 give your opinion as well . on the one hand, some believe that
schools
Use synonyms
 teacher should give preference to the skills because always fruitful for them in their
future
Use synonyms
 and
also
Linking Words
 if you learn some
skill
Use synonyms
 in your childhood
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
you'll be
experted
Correct your spelling
expected
exported
 in that departments.
for instance
Linking Words
, in
canada
Change the capitalization
Canada
show examples
 all the
school's
Change noun form
schools
show examples
 should more value
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
skill
Use synonyms
 rather than the wide
range
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 and
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
.
furthermore
Linking Words
.
people
Use synonyms
 think that
schools
Use synonyms
 should give more value to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
skill
Use synonyms
 level because once they learn one of the
Use synonyms
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 so they never sleep hungry.
on the other hand
Linking Words
,
vast
Correct article usage
the vast
show examples
 majority
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 think that
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
subject
Correct article usage
the subject
show examples
 will be more
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
 for their
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 in
future
Use synonyms
.
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 would like to highlight some major
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as math and physics
will
Correct pronoun usage
that will
show examples
more
Add a missing verb
be more
show examples
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their
life's
Change noun form
lives
show examples
 .to illustrate, most of the
schools
Use synonyms
 are aware of tech
them
Change the pronoun
they
show examples
range
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 like
advances
Wrong verb form
advanced
show examples
english
Change the capitalization
English
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will be helpful in high education.
in addition
Linking Words
,
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 important to learn due
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 modern era because in
future
Use synonyms
 it
all
Add a missing verb
is all
show examples
 about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology so you'll get
know
Fix the infinitive
to know
show examples
 about that by
learn
Change the verb form
learning
show examples
 different subjects.
for example
Linking Words
, many school
system
Change to a plural noun
systems
show examples
 are giving
aware
Replace the word
awareness
show examples
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
web designers and conducting a class on that every week . to sum up,
people
Use synonyms
 believed that
skill
Use synonyms
 more important than
Use synonyms
range
Correct article usage
a range
show examples
 of
subject
Use synonyms
 but other thinks that
Use synonyms
range
Correct article usage
a range
show examples
 of
subject
Use synonyms
 will be fruitful for them in their kids
Use synonyms
future's
Change the noun form
futures
future
show examples
. in my opinion,
skill
Use synonyms
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
 important than
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 because skills
Correct your spelling
always
alwsys
Correct your spelling
always
 be in your hands.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: