Many countries have compulsory military service for young men after they leave school. It would be a good idea for all countries to adopt this system for men, and possibly for women too. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#countries #service #men #school #idea #system #women

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is often widely debated whether mandatory military service should be introduced to the youth in most countries around the world. I strongly agree with

this

Linking Words

statement due to the reasons outlined below. There are various benefits of serving the country.

Firstly

Linking Words

, individuals learn to work as a team and hone skills

such

Linking Words

as comradery among the other service people.

For example

Linking Words

, In South Korea, a country in which military enlistment is mandatory for young men, it was proven that these skills went on to help these folks in their daily activities. These qualities they developed helped them in their future to improve their quality of life.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, military enlistment

also

Linking Words

looks good on a person's record.

For instance

Linking Words

, an individual who served in the army has a higher probability of being employed as opposed to someone who did not.

This

Linking Words

is because many organisations look for employees who are trained beforehand and those who have experience with solving problems head-on. An added benefit of serving the nation is maintaining good health and well-being. Service people usually indulge in a significant amount of physical activity leading to better fitness among the youth.

This

Linking Words

results in a gradual decrease in obesity rates within the nation. Not only that but an increased life expectancy of the public can

also

Linking Words

be observed. In conclusion, enlistment can be advantageous to a person for jobs, keeping fit and

also

Linking Words

honing many vital skills.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is important that young men and women are promoted to serve for a certain time period towards their nation.

Submitted by rdbowalgaha on Tue Oct 11 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

259 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Compulsory
Military service
Conscription
Patriotism
National security
Social equality
Discipline
Physical fitness
Life skills
Job training
Infringement
Conscripts
Gender equality
Mandatory
Economy
Education system
Labor market
Civil service
Alternative forms
Balanced view

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. In some cultures, children are told they can achieve anything if they work hard. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message? Write at least 250 words.
In today's era, some cultures make children believe that if they work hard they can achieve anything, and sometimes that doesn't go well for a lot of children, this is because maybe they don't have the same opportunities or only work hard in class hours, and they won't put in the extra work or don't have consistency. Overall, this essay will try to deconstruct that idea to make it efficient.
7
band
Culture and education both play an important role with many countries, some say that preservation of culture has its features while others think that instead of culture people should focus on education in the country. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give examples and reasons to support your claims.
The importance of old traditions and education plays an important role in everyone's life. It helps you to maintain both sides easily in your society. Some people believe that the protection of culture has its own benefits , however, other pupils and I myself , believe that in spite of traditional things they should more focus on their education. I will explain both views including my opinion in the upcoming paragraphs.
5.5
band
Today, there are more television channels than ever before. Some people think this leads to more choices for television viewers. Others, however, believe this causes the quality of television programmes to decline. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
One of the most prevalent trends in today's world is a cumulative upsurge in TV channels as compared to past few years. Nowadays, it is easy to watch the programs of all the languages broadcasted from all over the world which in turn, decreasing the quality of content shared in them. The arguement about whether the quality has been declined or this leads to more choices for television viewers is widely debated. In this essay, I will discuss both the views and present my own opinion at the end.
5.5
band
The Impact of Technology on Education and Learning
In the contemporary era, technology plays an increasingly pivotal role in the realm of education and learning, ushering in both positive transformations and potential challenges. While some hail technology as a catalyst for enhancing educational quality and efficacy, others caution against its potential to exacerbate societal disparities and diminish social interactions.
5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
Nowadays there is more choice for the consumers then ever in the past. Most small towns have a large supermarket and you can buy any product on the internet with just the click. This might be good for consumners but small local shops are competition and they have to close, in my opinion we need to protect small shops by closing.

Many countries have compulsory military service for young men after they leave school. It would be a good idea for all countries to adopt this system for men, and possibly for women too. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. In some cultures, children are told they can achieve anything if they work hard. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message? Write at least 250 words.

Today, there are more television channels than ever before. Some people think this leads to more choices for television viewers. Others, however, believe this causes the quality of television programmes to decline. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The Impact of Technology on Education and Learning