Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There has been much discussion revolving around the issue of whether museums are places to spend your leisure time or the main purpose is education. In it would be more useful if they were connected together. By doing that, it would be beneficial from the side of education and entertainment.
this
essay
I am going to present both views and give my opinion. Some people tend to think that the most important thing Add a comma
essay,
of
Change preposition
about
the
museums is to let everyone relax and Correct article usage
apply
enjoy
Correct pronoun usage
enjoy themselves
,
because it will let them overcome stress. One of the first things we need to take into consideration is that modern society Remove the comma
apply
have
enough pressure in everyday life and information flow Change the verb form
has
in
erroneous, it all can even lead to depression, that’s why visiting cultural places like that may help to deal with it. Correct your spelling
is
For example
, by looking at historical artefacts or art peaces
person can abstract and forget about worries, it helps to rest and generate new powers to prevent emotional burnout. Correct your spelling
pieces
However
, others insist that cultural institutions need to be visited, because of the importance of being educated. Modern technology is taking place over
the world and people tend to spend their free time online rather than visiting museums, it mostly affects teenagers that’s why Rephrase
all over
majority
of them aren’t versed in history and art. Some people are afraid that Add an article
the majority
a majority
growing
generation will have nothing to tell their descendants Correct article usage
the growing
due to
the lack of education in culture. Having considered both views, I am convinced that each statement is right and in my opinionAdd a comma
,
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite