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Band 4.5

Government should focus their spending on public services rather than arts such as music and painting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #focus #services #arts #music
Nowadays, the government should invest money in order to guarantee welfare to their citizens. Spending on arts, especially
such
 as painting and music looks like to be a smart decision, but someone argues that the state should be more focused on improving public dawning. I completely agree with the latter because public services have to be the priority in a country.
Firstly
, providing a good
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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of
Change preposition
for
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 graduation leads to a major of people's satisfaction. Sectors like school and sanity are the columns in a community. If governments decide to invest a large number of capital in these fields, every citizen will benefit from
this
.
For instance
, offering a high-quality nature education can guarantee a brighter future for youngsters and
in
Change preposition
apply
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meanwhile
Correct article usage
the meanwhile
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 a good quality of public health assures safety among individuals.
Secondly
, in order to improve the tourism industry, offering good public convocation increase the country's attractiveness. Tourists are not only interested in the main attractions of an area, but
also
 in its safety, aspect of public health and public transport efficiency. A clear example is offered by Italy, which, despite a richness of natural and historical landmarks, each year disappoints visitors in matters of public dawning like the timing of public vehicles or bureaucracy. To conclude, in my ,opinion the government should allocate their funds to
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 onset so as to guarantee a good condition of life for their citizens and improve the attractiveness for visitors.
Nevertheless
, it's
also
 important to not forget the cultural aspect of the country.
Submitted by tommasobelgrano02 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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