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Many students are taught to push themselves to try and be better than other students, rather than work together for everyone’s benefits. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#students #work #everyone’s
In recent times, it is widely acknowledged that study is one of the most crucial things and many
students
 try to achieve
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
 various ways, some people support the opinion that
students
 cannot build a better future by working together.
However
,
others
 strongly believe that
students
 should be self-motivated to become better than
others
.
Nonetheless
, from my point of view, I agree with the previous point. In the following paragraphs, we will discuss both perspectives in
this
 essay. People feel that
students
 should learn to push themselves to compete with
others
 to be better human beings, as
this
 attitude will help them in the long run and motivates them to think out of the box.
For instance
, Harvard University research confirms that self-learned habits are hard to be forgotten like
waking-up
Correct your spelling
waking up
show examples
 early, punctuality,
respecting
Correct word choice
and respecting
show examples
 elders etc., When these habits are taught by parents from early childhood, it is hard for the youngsters to change them.
However
, these kids will have a hard time
to mingle
Change the verb form
mingling
show examples
 and
accept
Wrong verb form
accepting
show examples
others
 as they are not used to
this
.
In contrast
, some people believe that working together with other
students
 can benefit both, as it enhances sharing and caring for each other.
Further
,
this
 will help the young generations to stay united and learn from other's
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
show examples
.
For example
,
students
 who are exposed to boarding school will have the tendency to accept fellow
students
 well than the
day-scholars
Correct your spelling
day scholars
show examples
 because they spend ample
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
 of time with each other and are exposed to
students
 with varying cultural and economic backgrounds. In conclusion,
students
 working together in creating a promising future helps both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals and society
thus
 outweighs the benefits of them pushing themselves to be better.
First
 of all, I strongly believe that
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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