Government spends much money for education. More money should be spent for free time activities. To what extend do agree or disagree?
It is often argued that the regime has an indispensable role in subsidizing the community in every sphere
such
as,
education, health, and some other exercise. Remove the comma
apply
Although
I agree that government
should pay more expenditure on the educational system, I think that a portion of these expenses must be allocated to welfare activities.
At the outset, a certain budget that will be spent on enhancing the learning sector is not a waste of money. Correct article usage
the government
To begin
with, schooling is a substantial factor that contributes to countries’ progress, thus
, myriads of authorities make sure that their citizens will obtain proper learning. For instance
, the government offer a scholarship to students who performed
well in their studies with a high degree to complete their schooling beyond national borders, Wrong verb form
perform
therefore
, they will lead their countries in versatile fields. Academic qualifications are required in many professions. For example
, it is impossible to become a doctor, teacher, or lawyer without having a relevant degree. That is
why I believe that the regime should allocate a great portion of the money to ameliorate the educational system.
In sharp contrast to this
, authorities must pay attention to support other activities. To begin
with, leisure exercises must be considered as fundamental factors which contribute to developing the intellectual capabilities of people. For example
, playing a chess game can boost the logical thinking of players. Moreover
, while
a lot of competitions have been held worldwide and this
exhorts citizens to participate, as a result
, if they win, it will be beneficial to gain a good reputation for their countries, and they will be given a rewarding prize. Thus
, I believe that is
important to spend money on other activities
To put it in a nutshell, although
I agree that authorities must devote a proportion of their finances to enhancing education, I think that leisure sports must be supported and given a huge concern like schooling.Submitted by rehameldweik on
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task response
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points and strengthen your argument.
lexical resource
Ensure that your lexical choices are more varied and precise to enhance clarity and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Work on maintaining the logical structure of your essay, especially when transitioning between ideas and paragraphs.
grammatical range
Review and revise your sentence structures and grammar usage to minimize errors and improve accuracy.
Your opinion
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?