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Today, the lifespan of people is much higher than before. Some people think that older people should continue to be involved in the workforce. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#lifespan #people #workforce
no doubt, some
people
 believe that old
people
 should
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continue
continiue
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continue
 at
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
instead
 of
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retirement
retirment
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retirement
 due to
increasing
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the increasing
show examples
 average life
expactancy
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expectancy
. I personally disagree with
this
 statement , because
decreasing
Add an article
the decreasing
show examples
 capability of older
people
 to handle challenging
work
 situations and
in addition
less
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
job vacancies for today's youngsters.
to begin
 with
main
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the main
show examples
 reason why old aged
people
 should
retired
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retire
show examples
 from the
workplace
 is that
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senior
seniour
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senior
 citizens are unable to
coorporate
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cooperate
 with difficult situations at
workplace
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the workplace
show examples
 because of their declining health status day by day.
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Moreover
Morover
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Moreover
,nowadays every individual need to stay active in order to make a reputation at
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
 in
this
 world of competition.
For instance
,in developed countries especially in America,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 retired their older citizens at the age of 60. Since
they
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arethey
werethey
show examples
 aware
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
ability
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the ability
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 not
doing
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
work
 in a given period of time or due to their
inatentiveness
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inattentiveness
 ,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
 it would
be affect
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be affected
show examples
 to
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the company
a company
show examples
company
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company's
show examples
 from achieving success.
In addition
,another contributing factor is already
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
 job opportunities for youngsters. If old
people
 remain at
work place
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workplace
show examples
 often their limit of age. it would
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lead to
issue
Add an article
the issue
show examples
 of unemployment among individuals.
Nevertheless
,
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a recent survey conducted by the times of America
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
revealed that about 50% unemployment rate has increased due to allowing old
people
 to
work
 at job places,which decreased opportunities for adults.
Thus
,older
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 retirement is necessary to provide opportunities to youngsters. In conclusion,the old citizens
allow
Change the form of the verb
allowed
show examples
to
Change the verb form
working
show examples
work
 after the age of retirement is not
an
Change the article
apply
show examples
appropriate for the
workplace
 in terms of dropping health and
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
Correct your spelling
opportunities
oportunities
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opportunities
 for adults.
Submitted by bekzodeshonjonovv on

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