Today, some people think that universities should accept equal numbers of female and male in every subject. Others believe that this is an unacceptable policy. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In today's world, a portion of people
think
Change the verb form
thinks
show examples
that universities should accept equal numbers of female and male
students
in every
subject
. But the others do not agree with
this
assessment. Both of these do have their own points and are valid in certain
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
. An equal number of
students
in every
subject
could theoretically
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
many noticeable changes in the way that people think.
First
and foremost,
this
could promote
gender
equalities
Fix the agreement mistake
equality
show examples
.
Gender
equalities mean that both genders are given equal opportunities to pursue their dreams.
Thus
, giving them equal chance at getting a job.
For instance
, some jobs are thought to be for men and men only, but by applying the rule of accepting
equal
Change the article
an equal
the equal
show examples
number of males and females, that problem will disappear. Another good that
this
rule does is breaking
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social taboos,
for
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
some think that one
gender
cannot or should not study
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
subject
that the opposite
gender
is already good at.
In contrast
to
this
idea, some thinks
otherwise
, they believe that it is an unacceptable
policy
. They may consider
this
policy
unfair because it disregarded the
students
' freedom to choose what they want to do. If
an
Change the article
a
show examples
university normally
accept
Change the verb form
accepts
show examples
1000
students
per
subject
, after applying the mentioned
policy
, the chance of getting
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
the
subject
is halved. So the ones who are truly passionate about the
subject
have to switch their major. Another
Correct your spelling
problem
prooblem
Correct your spelling
problem
that the idea create is unemployment. In
theory
Add a comma
,theory
show examples
it should give both genders equal opportunities to get a job but
this
does not apply to real life. As a matter of fact, it does quite the opposite. It is true that they study the same
subject
but companies usually prefer one
gender
over the other for certain positions,
thus
create
Wrong verb form
creating
show examples
an
abundant
Replace the word
abundance
show examples
of unemployed and
this
could
Correct your spelling
lead
show examples
lea
Correct your spelling
lead
show examples
to an increase in unemployment. All in all, the
policy
seems to be amazing in theory but applying it to the world could create more problems than it can solve.
Submitted by shin.le1988 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!