IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

WITH A FAST PACE OF MODERN LIFE MORE AND MORE PEOPLE AE TURING TOWARDS. FAST FOOD FOR THEIR MAIN MEALS .WHATS ARE ADVANTAGE AND DISADVANTAGE OF FAST FOOD.

#pace #life #people #ae #food #meals #whats #advantage
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
School
Use synonyms
 uniforms are essential in a wide range of schools. We often asked ourselves while we were teenagers, why we are wearing a uniform? Some people believe that it is not necessary, since there are no benefits from it, while on contrary, others believe it is important and we shouldn't stop
this
Linking Words
 tradition. In my opinion, wearing a standard custom is not beneficial and it is negatively affecting children.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I strongly disagree with the concept of having the same dress for more than a thousand
students
Use synonyms
, simply because we will not have the rhythm of wearing our new clothes every day.
In other words
Linking Words
, we became robots.
In addition
Linking Words
, the majority all
students
Use synonyms
 hate wearing them, so definitely there is an issue with them. Mostly, because we usually don't like to wear the same clothes every day, it becomes boring, even in our daily life, we cannot do it.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, we hate to see other people wearing the same clothes. Indeed, in my
school
Use synonyms
, some kids faced psychological issues from wearing the same staff every day. Following
this
Linking Words
, In my country, not wearing a custom is strictly forbidden,
besides
Linking Words
 it might lead to termination, all the
students
Use synonyms
 were wearing it, as it is required in the whole country. On
this
Linking Words
 occasion, I used to wear it as well, and a barely remember going to
school
Use synonyms
 without it.
However
Linking Words
, one incident I remember, I was going to
school
Use synonyms
 early in the morning when it suddenly started raining, I got really wet, on my way I passed by one shop and bought a jacket, I wear it and removed my custom
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when I reached out to
school
Use synonyms
 I was kicked out without even listening to my objection. To sum up,
although
Linking Words
 it is forbidden worldwide to not wear a student custome, in my ,opinion and from my experience, it is something not beneficial and leads to a lot of issues we will regret later. Schools should try allowing
students
Use synonyms
 to wear whatever they want and measure the consequences.
Submitted by ayoub.mehdi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: