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Band 5

As people live longer and longer, the idea of cloning human beings in order to provide spare parts is becoming a reality. The idea horrifies most people, yet it is no longer mere science fiction. To what extent do you agree with such a procedure?

#people #idea #beings #parts #reality #horrifies #science #fiction #procedure
It is believed that
people
 should take
risks
 in their personal as well as professional lives. There are certain pros and cons associated with
this
 approach. I believe that taking
risks
 has more benefits than drawbacks and my
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
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view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
 is supported in the following paragraphs.
To begin
 with, in their personal
life
Replace the word
lives
show examples
, many
people
 break the stereotypes and follow their dreams.
For example
, many girls today speak against the gender bias and restrictions imposed on them, without caring about the
Add a hyphen
male-dominated
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male dominated
Add a hyphen
male-dominated
show examples
 society. Due to their courage,
sex
Correct article usage
the sex
show examples
 ratio and female literacy rate in many regions have improved substantially.
Similarly
, some
people
 invest their
lifetime
Replace the word
life
show examples
 savings in mutual funds or share markets, rather than depositing in a bank or
post-office
Correct your spelling
post office
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 which are safer places to keep
money
Add an article
the money
show examples
 as these are not exposed to market
risks
. But
people
 take the
risk
 to invest their money in fluctuating markets hoping to earn a better return, sometimes twice as much as what is offered by the banks. So,
people
 who take
such
 daring steps have an improved chance of making a fortune
although
 the
risk
 of making a loss is
also
 high.
Similarly
, in their professional life,
people
 take various types of risky steps in order to attain their desired goals and positions. Sometimes they fail, but it is worth taking
risks
 to achieve success in life. Elon Musk, the owner of companies like Tesla and Space X, is an inspirational example in front of us. He dared to make
electrical
Replace the word
electric
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 vehicles and reusable rockets
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 when nobody believed him. But he toiled ceaselessly to become successful and now he is the richest person in the world and contributing a lot to
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
 the greenhouse effect.
Thus
,
risk
 appetite makes
people
 more courageous and develops their
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
show examples
 skills which cannot be acquired by merely following others.
However
, sometimes
Add a hyphen
risk-taking
show examples
risk taking
Add a hyphen
risk-taking
show examples
 can
also
 backfire. Failure may lead to broken confidence, depression and financial losses. But with persistent effort, hard work and knowledge one can easily overcome these demerits and become successful. Kiran Bedi, the
first
 lady IPS in India, and Gautam Adani are noteworthy examples of
people
 who with their courageous efforts and
risk
-taking abilities achieved tremendous success.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cloning
  • spare parts
  • ethics
  • organ donation
  • regenerative medicine
  • bioethics
  • genetic diversity
  • synthetic biology
  • biotechnology
  • therapeutic cloning
  • reproductive cloning
  • autonomy
  • consent
  • morality
  • legislation
  • genetic engineering
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