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Band 5.5

Some people believe that childhood is the best stage of happiness. While others believe that a person can enjoy more happiness in other stages of life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #childhood #stage #happiness #person #stages #life
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Happiness
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 is a feeling which varies from person to person. In the opinion of many,
joy
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 comes in
the
Change the word
its
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 best form during an early part of
life
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 as
childhood
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, whereas other people think it comes at most when they can enjoy it as an adult at different phases of their
life
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.
This
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 essay will
first
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 put light on both concepts and
then
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 will state my point of view regarding
this
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 matter. In
childhood
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, a boy or girl sees everything in a simple manner and finds contentment even in small points.
For example
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, even a balloon or a
car
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 can make a child ecstatic which adults can never understand. For many children going to the park is a matter of
joy
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 and they enjoy
to
Correct pronoun usage
this to
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 the fullest in
this
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 activity.
On the contrary
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, some people opine that the true feelings of
joy
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 come in adulthood when they can fully understand the meaning of
this
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 feeling. For an instance, purchasing own home or
car
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, getting married to a loved one, having offspring or achieving a milestone in professional
life
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 can bring fulfilment, resulting in
happiness
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 in one’s
life
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. These aspects of
life
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 can bring more heart-warming feelings than at the time of
childhood
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. In my opinion, we can enjoy the feelings of
happiness
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 in later phases of our
life
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 because we can understand the meaning of that
joy
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 in our adulthood rather
in
Correct word choice
than in
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 the early part of our
life
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.
In addition
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, we can work for the desired
happiness
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 to make it possible which we can never be able to do at a young age.
For instance
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, we could have cried for that
car
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 or balloon in our
childhood
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, but the decision of purchasing it for us was entirely dependent on our parents.
However
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, as an
adult
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,adult
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 we can work hard for purchasing our dream
car
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 which can make us ultimate ecstatic. To finish up my thought, I would like to say that
happiness
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 is an abstract feeling which can be found in various stages for different people. It depends on a person how they perceive the feeling at the different phases of their
life
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.
Submitted by sajiaafrin on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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