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Writing Samples
Band 5

Today, most children have difficulties to concentrate or pay attention. What could be the causes of this? What are the possible solutions for this?

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Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
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 of the
children
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 these days find difficulty in focusing. Ready-mate available
Use synonyms
answer
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answers
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 and lack of interest in
given
Add an article
a given
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 subject are the reasons behind it
however
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 it can get solved through
motivation
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 and by bringing variation in teaching styles.
First
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 of all, with the advancement of technology, it has been so easy to search
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Change preposition
for answer
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answer
Fix the agreement mistake
answers
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in
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on
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 google and
other online platform
Change the wording
another online platform
other online platforms
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 where
children
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 copy the
answer
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 and don’t
Correct your spelling
tend
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tent
Correct your spelling
tend
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 to
use
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 their own creativity.
This
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 has indeed
decrease
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decreased
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 their ability
of
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to
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concentration
Replace the word
concentrate
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Change preposition
on
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by
Correct your spelling
my
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 own.
For example
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; with
introduction
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the introduction
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 of
online
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the online
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 class system after covid pandemic in Nepal, sending
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answer
Fix the agreement mistake
answers
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 among friends is now widely seen.
Also
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, some of the
youngers
Correct your spelling
younger
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 are found not interested in the given topic as everyone has their choice of subject, some like math very much while
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 prefer English and vice versa.
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Similarly
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,Similarly
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 if the teaching style from the teacher is monotonous
then
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this
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 will
also
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 decrease their energy in learning.
Therefore
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,
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use
Correct article usage
the use
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 of pre-made
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answer
Fix the agreement mistake
answers
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 by downloading
through
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apply
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online or copying
of
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apply
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friends and detachment
with
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from
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subject
Add an article
the subject
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 matter are the prime reasons
of
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for
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 being unable to concentrate by the juveniles.
Secondly
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, good
motivation
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 plays a crucial role in
children
Use synonyms
’s brain as their mind is like
of
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apply
show examples
clay whatever shape is given they become like that. So encouraging them for creating own ideas will enhance their ability
of focusing
Replace the preposition
to focus
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.
Likewise
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,
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
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 in the way of teaching will draw the attention of a child
such
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 as
,
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apply
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 PowerPoint, demonstration,
audio-visual
Correct word choice
and audio-visual
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, to name a few.
For instance
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,
significant
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a significant
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 ratio of
children
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 in schools
are
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is
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 found
benefitted
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to benefit
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with
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from
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Use synonyms
use
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the use
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 of different methods of
teaching learning
Add a hyphen
teaching-learning
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.
Hence
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,
motivation
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 and various forms of study method
helps
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help
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 in drawing the focus of
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
children
a child
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children
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. In conclusion, easy distraction among
young
Correct article usage
the young
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 population is commonly seen these days where technology providing
easy
Add an article
the easy
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solution
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solutions
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 and lack of attachment
with
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to
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 that content are noted as
a
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the
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 main
factor
Fix the agreement mistake
factors
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. But giving them the right
motivation
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 and
use
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 of alternate methods in teaching will help the
children
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 to concentrate more.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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