Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programme (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is an opinion that high
school
students
should be engaged in voluntary works
as a mandatory part of their Fix the agreement mistake
work
school
system. In recent days, under the uncertain social environment, the increasing number of students
' lives are
tend to be limited within their small Unnecessary verb
apply
society
between their school
and home. I absolutely agree to
the idea of making voluntary Change preposition
with
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
as
a necessary subject in high Change preposition
apply
school
, as it can expand their experience in different
Add an article
a different
society
than they usually belong Fix the agreement mistake
societies
and
Change preposition
to and
also
they can get various hints for their future
careers.
First
, by making all the students
work as a volunteers
Correct the article-noun agreement
a volunteer
volunteers
at
various communities, the Change preposition
in
Correct your spelling
students
studnets
can get precious opportunities to learn how the community outside of their daily lives are structured and how various Correct your spelling
students
people
are living everyday
. Replace the word
every day
For example
, when they work at a senior house taking care of aged people
, they can learn how those institutions are being managed and what kind of people
are working there. Also
, they can experience the issue of increasing
number of senior citizens and how those aged Add an article
an increasing
the increasing
people
are facing various problems everyday
at Replace the word
every day
first
hand.
The second
reason I strongly agree that voluntary activities are good for high school
students
is the benefit it gives when they come to think of their future
. Take it for example
, when they took up an activity to teach sports or mathematics to younger children in their society
, they would learn whether or not teaching is something they would like to do for their occupation in the future
. Likewise
, there must be a
plenty of other occasions that they can learn hints for their Remove the article
apply
future
career choices which they cannot get hold of by only studying at school
or talking with their family members.
As discussed above, doing voluntary works
at high Fix the agreement mistake
work
school
has a great benefit to students
' education. In
particular
that can teach them how Add a comma
,particular
the
Correct article usage
apply
society
is structured, how people
are working everyday
, and what kind of job opportunities are out there after they finish Replace the word
every day
school
. In conclusion, I absolutely agree that we should make voluntary work services as
a mandatory part of high Change preposition
apply
school
education.Submitted by michima2011 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite