IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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People
Use synonyms
 have different
view
Fix the agreement mistake
views
show examples
 about whether
universities
Use synonyms
 should give chances to
students
Use synonyms
 with
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 grades or to
every one
Replace the word
everyone
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 all
ages
Use synonyms
 including those who did not perform well
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 high
Use synonyms
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
 it can be argued that
students
Use synonyms
 who have good results deserve to offer a
place
Use synonyms
 in higher
education
Use synonyms
 compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others, I believe that
universities
Use synonyms
 should offer places for all
students
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 different
ages
Use synonyms
 and learning backgrounds. On the one hand, it is argued
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
that good pupils are only the ones who deserve to have a
place
Use synonyms
 in
universities
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, before entering
Use synonyms
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
show examples
, every single person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to invest plenty of time, money and effort during compulsory
education
Use synonyms
 programs counted from joining
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
kindergarten to
a high
Correct the article-noun agreement
high schools
a high school
show examples
schools
Use synonyms
,
As a result
Linking Words
, higher
education
Use synonyms
 like
universities
Use synonyms
 should be only for those who aim to expand their knowledge and they could be a crucial part of the society.
Secondly
Linking Words
, graduating from a university can offer graduates opportunities in
future
Correct pronoun usage
their future
show examples
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, I would side with those who believe that
students
Use synonyms
 of all
ages
Use synonyms
 and all learning assessment results should have a
place
Use synonyms
 in
universities
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, every
Use synonyms
students
Change to a singular noun
student
show examples
 have their own abilities in learning different kinds of field, they could not able to perform well at school in necessary subjects but I opine that the majority of
people
Use synonyms
 can make sure that they would perform in higher
education
Use synonyms
 as badly as in lower grade
schools
Use synonyms
. Typically, some
people
Use synonyms
 have gifts in subjects of Arts like playing instruments or designing things. They can be able to perform
excellent
Change the adjective
excellently
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 when they have specific training in
universities
Use synonyms
 despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
bad
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
 in other unrelated subjects at
schools
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Although
Linking Words
, older
students
Use synonyms
 might not have
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
 abilities in acquire
further
Linking Words
 knowledge
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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because of their family condition, they are not able to join
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
university when they are younger, it would be unfair if those
people
Use synonyms
 would like to attend
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
universities
Use synonyms
 when they have a chance. In conclusion, while it is true that
universities
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 should give chances
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 good and younger
students
Use synonyms
, I would completely agree with those who believe that
students
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in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 different
ages
Use synonyms
 and learning
assessment
Fix the agreement mistake
assessments
show examples
 could be able to have a
place
Use synonyms
 in
universities
Use synonyms
.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • merit-based
  • competitive environment
  • academic standards
  • innovation
  • diversity
  • mature students
  • equitable
  • inclusive admission policies
  • educational disadvantages
  • holistic admission process
  • extracurricular achievements
  • non-traditional students
  • equal opportunities
  • societal progress
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