Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People
have different
view
Fix the agreement mistake
views
show examples
about whether
universities
should give chances to
students
with
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
grades or to
every one
Replace the word
everyone
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
all
ages
including those who did not perform well
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
high
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
.
Although
it can be argued that
students
who have good results deserve to offer a
place
in higher
education
compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others, I believe that
universities
should offer places for all
students
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
different
ages
and learning backgrounds. On the one hand, it is argued
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
that good pupils are only the ones who deserve to have a
place
in
universities
.
Firstly
, before entering
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
show examples
, every single person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to invest plenty of time, money and effort during compulsory
education
programs counted from joining
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
kindergarten to
a high
Correct the article-noun agreement
high schools
a high school
show examples
schools
,
As a result
, higher
education
like
universities
should be only for those who aim to expand their knowledge and they could be a crucial part of the society.
Secondly
, graduating from a university can offer graduates opportunities in
future
Correct pronoun usage
their future
show examples
career
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careers
show examples
.
On the other hand
, I would side with those who believe that
students
of all
ages
and all learning assessment results should have a
place
in
universities
.
To begin
with, every
students
Change to a singular noun
student
show examples
have their own abilities in learning different kinds of field, they could not able to perform well at school in necessary subjects but I opine that the majority of
people
can make sure that they would perform in higher
education
as badly as in lower grade
schools
. Typically, some
people
have gifts in subjects of Arts like playing instruments or designing things. They can be able to perform
excellent
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excellently
show examples
when they have specific training in
universities
despite
of
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apply
show examples
bad
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
in other unrelated subjects at
schools
.
In addition
,
Although
, older
students
might not have
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
abilities in acquire
further
knowledge
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
because of their family condition, they are not able to join
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
university when they are younger, it would be unfair if those
people
would like to attend
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
universities
when they have a chance. In conclusion, while it is true that
universities
should give chances
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
good and younger
students
, I would completely agree with those who believe that
students
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
different
ages
and learning
assessment
Fix the agreement mistake
assessments
show examples
could be able to have a
place
in
universities
.
Submitted by trancaomaitrang on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • merit-based
  • competitive environment
  • academic standards
  • innovation
  • diversity
  • mature students
  • equitable
  • inclusive admission policies
  • educational disadvantages
  • holistic admission process
  • extracurricular achievements
  • non-traditional students
  • equal opportunities
  • societal progress
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