Some people believe that museums should be enjoyable and entertaining to attract young people, while others think that museums should only serve educational purposes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #museums #purposes

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Some

people

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claim that

museums

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should be attractive to youngsters, while others argue that

museums

Use synonyms

are places to be employed for only educational aims. In my opinion, educational goals could be achieved while the entertaining aspects for visitors are considered. The entertaining atmosphere of

museums

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could improve a country's development by attracting young

people

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. Young

people

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are an important part of each society. In today’s world, they are faced with different threats to the community and even themselves. By introducing an enjoyable space at

museums

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and defining some historical and cultural activities, youngsters could take part in

such

Linking Words

activities as an active part of it. By participating in a variety of cultural activities, various groups with energetic young

people

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are formed and their outcome could play an important role in the country's cultural and artistic development.

For example

Linking Words

, in my

country

Add a comma

,country

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there are some

museums

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like the Saadabad museum complex which are equipped with cafes and cinemas with the same cultural and historical theme,

as a result

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of which many young

people

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are attracted to these centres. Others,

however

Linking Words

, argue that

museums

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should be only used as

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

educational

tool

Fix the agreement mistake

tools

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. The value of educational aspects of

museums

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should be considered by their real fans only. When

museums

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are available only for educational aims, they are in less danger of being undervalued by unsophisticated visitors.

Also

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

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real lovers of

museums

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might donate some valuable objects to them for educational purposes in the future.

As a result

Linking Words

museums

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will be freshly available for long years with a variety of things from the past.

For example

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, some

museums

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’ management in the city of Shiraz, Iran, is delegated to the universities so that they can be used for purely educational purposes

such

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as educating passionate students who are majoring in related fields to arts and culture. In my opinion, educational aims could be more achievable while a creative and entertaining atmosphere in

museums

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is established. In

such

Linking Words

museums

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, educational objects in form of art can be delivered to young

people

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who visit. To conclude, historical and cultural aspects of

museums

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could be presented in an enjoyable atmosphere while their educational aims are kept valuable for visitors.

Submitted by samadmahoor on Sun Oct 30 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

363 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Interactive displays
Engagement
Virtual reality experiences
Traditional academic setting
Foot traffic
Digital interactives
Educational content
Cultural preservation
Revenue streams
Hybrid model

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Some people believe that museums should be enjoyable and entertaining to attract young people, while others think that museums should only serve educational purposes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In order to solve traffic jams and home problems, people believe that it can be solved by removing companies, factories and employees to country side. To what extend do you agree?

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

some people believe that young people who commit serious crimes should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?