IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Government should focus their spending on public service rather than on arts such as music and painting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #focus #service #arts #music
Government should focus their spending on public
service
 rather than on arts
such
 as music and painting. In my opinion, I strongly agree with
this
 statement, and the following examples will be provided
an
Add the preposition
with an
show examples
 example in order to support my point of view. One of the most important reasons why the common
service
 is supposed to be spent on is that it helps the population to improve their life’s
quality
 because they will be regularly provided good benefits
for example
, according to the latest research conducted by Bangkok University, it was revealed that 80 per cent of governments all around the world have spent on public
service
 as they desire high
quality
 for their people. The result has come obviously as their wish. Another reason to support
this
 is the fact that their
quality
 will be more provided.
This
 is due to the fact that people are more likely to be happy with the amenities which the government has spent on. To illustrate
this
, in recent news, it has been reported that in one of the largest cities, the governments will spend on public
service
 because they have
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 plan to persuade tourists to visit their country for the good economy
Change preposition
of
show examples
the country. In conclusion, it is undoubtedly true that the government should spend on public
service
 more than artistry because the common
service
 can bring about
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 high
quality
 of
service
 to citizens, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good economics will be brought after
Submitted by suturnday on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: