Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree ?

A lot of rich
people
nowadays try to help poor
people
.
This
paper will investigate the advantages of being rich. Eventually, I will highlight the most important factor about being rich and draw my own conclusion. In terms of some views, the most valuable thing that rich
people
can do is to help other
people
. The main reason provided to support
this
claim is that, if rich
people
help poor
people
, the percentage of poverty in the world will decrease. To illustrate, there are a lot of humanitarian institutions in the world that rely on the financial
aids
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aid
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received from the rich companies and
people
, and if these stakeholders don’t provide the needed amount of money,
then
there will not be enough resources to help the
people
in dire need.
Also
, when rich
people
provide aid,
then
this
helps in promoting stability and peace in the world.
Moreover
, having a lot of money can guarantee other important things to
people
.
Firstly
, being rich means there is enough money to guarantee a better quality of life.
For example
, rich parents can
enroll
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enrol
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their children in the best schools and provide
to
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apply
show examples
them
the
Change preposition
with the
show examples
best
health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare
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system.
Also
,
people
who are rich; live a luxurious life, and can spoil themselves by purchasing new cars and fancy houses. In conclusion, though there are various things that can make rich
people
happy, I believe that the most important thing is helping poor
people
, because through helping other
people
; many social problems will be eliminated, and a better quality of life will be provided to everyone.
Submitted by فارس 198 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealthy
  • financial resources
  • philanthropy
  • charitable organizations
  • donations
  • fundraising
  • support
  • initiatives
  • contribute
  • fulfillment
  • purpose
  • selfless
  • altruistic
  • prioritize
  • personal gain
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