IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some young people like to copy the behaviour and clothes of famous people today. Why might this be the case? What problems can it cause?

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The
trends
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 generated by top leading
stars
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 are so impactful today in our community that the consumption of products is increased rapidly because of their usage and promotion. Since young
people
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 followed their favourite movie
stars
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, fashion models and influencers closely on social media, they usually buy the same clothes and visit the locations in which their
stars
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 are frequent. Is that bad for young
people
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? In
this
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 essay, I will discuss both the potential issues and what caused
this
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 case.
First
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 of all, many clothing companies sponsor famous
stars
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 to promote their products in their movies and dramas.  Since the
trends
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 change quickly among the youth, they follow closely and buy whichever is possible even if clothes are so expensive.
Secondly
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, travel agencies and hotels promote their services through influencers quite often.
Furthermore
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, many young
people
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 like the activities,
such
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 as hanging out with their friends, and visiting their favourite beaches and shopping malls. Unless they didn't like those places, they usually spend their savings on vacations and eating out with friends to copy their idols.
On the other hand
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, some young
people
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 can't cope with the
trends
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 due to many factors,
for instance
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, saving money is difficult for students especially those from typical families.
In contrast
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, some will just ignore the
trends
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 and focus on their studies, some develop depression issues because of the
trends
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.  On top of that, some
stars
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 promote bad behaviour in the movie,
such
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 as smoking, drinking beer and committing crimes.
This
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 should be controlled to avoid more issues for young
people
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. In conclusion, young
people
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 will follow and copy their favourite
stars
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 but they should not do beyond what they can chew. They shouldn't care too much about the
trends
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 because they are always changing so fast.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • role models
  • aspire
  • influenced by
  • lifestyle
  • fashion choices
  • social media
  • visibility
  • accessible
  • desirable
  • followers
  • endorsements
  • marketing campaigns
  • trendsetters
  • peer pressure
  • conformity
  • emulate
  • experiment
  • identity
  • express themselves
  • admire
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