Shopping is the favorite free time activity for many young people today. Why do you think this has happened? Should young people be encouraged to do different activities in their free time rather than shopping? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#time #activity #people #activities

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Many teenagers nowadays spent their free

time

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shopping rather than playing games or studying.

This

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is not only because social media has influenced their lifestyle, but

also

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the way online shoppers encouraged its customer to buy

things

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more than ever. In my view, young

people

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should have more outdoor

activities

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, whether it is social or physical that will enhance their soft skills as well as social skills.

Firstly

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, social networks

such

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as Instagram and Facebook have enabled

people

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to access unlimited content from all over the world.

As a result

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, it unconsciously changed

people

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’s lifestyles which are highly correlated with how they spent their money.

In other words

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, many young

people

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are adopting each other lifestyle and

this

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results in more shopping

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

For example

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, every

time

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I see my friends upload their new stuff, I'm

also

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amazed and want to buy the same stuff.

Secondly

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, advertisements from online markets have impacted young

people

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to buy

things

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more than before.

This

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way will encourage

people

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to buy

things

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impulsively.

For instance

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, whenever I open an e-commerce app, there will be a section namely “product recommendation for you” that triggered me to scroll and buy

things

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I did not even need.

However

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, I personally believe that the young generation should have more offline

activities

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that enabled them to have social interaction with others. Any sports

activities

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or pro-bono community is highly recommended for teenagers to be able to develop their social skills.

Thus

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, it will be more beneficial for young

people

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to have

this

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kind of activity rather than spent

time

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shopping. To conclude, I believe that teenagers' shopping

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

is affected by several media including social media and advertisements from

an online sellers

Correct the article-noun agreement

online sellers

an online seller

show examples

. But it will be better if they spend their free

time

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doing outdoor

activities

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that would benefit them in the long run.

Submitted by aulia.muthia on Thu Nov 03 2022

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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Fully explain your ideas

The best way to solve environmental problems would be for the current generation to accept a simpler way of life for the sake of the next generation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people like to own the place where they live, but other people like to rent where they live. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some companies sponsor sports as away to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. discuss boyh sides and give your opinion.

Many scientists are concerned about global warming. Research shows that the worldwide increase in temperature is getting worse. Furthermore, global warming seems to be related to levels of pollution in the atmosphere. Discuss the causes of global warming and possible solutions to the problem.