in a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between two cities. other believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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There is an ongoing debate regarding government spending on transportation systems. A group of individuals believe that it is necessary to spend large amounts of
money
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on constructing new
railway
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lines for very fast
trains
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between two cities.
However
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, others argue/claim that the
money
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should be used to improve existing public transport.
Therefore
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, ahead of my
opinion
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, both
the
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apply
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views will be discussed
further
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. Examining the former
opinion
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, the primary argument the supporters would put forward is that fast
railway
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systems can save a significant amount of travelling time.
This
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is because high-speed
trains
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allow passengers to travel quickly and comfortably between cities, which can improve business activities and tourism.
In addition
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, they
also
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believe that modern
railway
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lines can reduce road traffic and pollution. The reason is that more people may choose
trains
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instead
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of private cars or buses for long-distance travel.
Furthermore
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, fast train networks are considered a symbol of national development and technological progress in many countries.
On the contrary
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, those in favour of the latter
opinion
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have their own arguments.
To begin
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with, they claim that improving existing public transport is more beneficial for ordinary citizens. Millions of people use buses, local
trains
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and metro services every day, so better facilities can improve their daily lives.
Moreover
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, spending huge amounts of
money
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on high-speed railways may not be affordable for developing countries. Governments may face financial pressure
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while
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, while
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many other important sectors
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such
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, such
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as healthcare and education
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also
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, also
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require investment.
For instance
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, repairing roads, increasing the number of buses and improving metro systems can benefit a larger population at a lower cost.
To conclude
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and offer my position, there are convincing arguments both for and against spending
money
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on new
railway
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lines.
However
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, I certainly favour the latter
opinion
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because improving existing public transport is more practical, economical and beneficial for the majority of people.

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task response
Task response: You answer all parts of the task, but your own view could be stronger in the body, not only in the end.
task response
Task response: Your ideas are clear, but some points are general. Add one more real or clear example to make your answer stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your essay has a clear 4-part structure, which is good. To get a higher score, make links between ideas more natural, not only with words like 'moreover' and 'furthermore'.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Some lines are a little wordy, for example 'ahead of my opinion'. Use simpler and more direct phrases like 'This essay will discuss both views and give my opinion.'
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Each main paragraph has one clear side, which is good. To improve more, explain one idea a bit deeper before moving to the next point.
task response
Task response: You discuss both views and give your opinion clearly.
task response
Task response: Your points stay on topic and are relevant to the question.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your introduction and conclusion are both present and clear.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion: Your essay is easy to follow because each paragraph has a clear purpose.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic growth
  • traffic congestion
  • environmentally friendly
  • stimulate regional development
  • carbon emissions
  • affordability
  • existing infrastructure
  • upgrading
  • reliable
  • inequality
  • public transport systems
  • commuting
  • high-speed trains
  • sustainability
  • decongesting
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