IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people say it is more important to plant trees in towns and cities than to build housing. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #plant #trees #towns #cities
It has been suggested that
people
 prefer to plant trees where they live.
Although
 not everyone will side with me in
this
 regard, I entirely agree with the statement. Those whose position is contrary to mine come up with a couple of reasons to justify the position they hold.
First
 and foremost, they believe that the number of
people
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 every year. In that case, society should think about
apartment
Fix the agreement mistake
apartments
show examples
.
However
,
people
 put the responsibility of flat. If
people
 do not have
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 apartment, where will they live?
In addition
 to
this
, they argue that some population think that building houses are more important, as far as, I am improving the value of land is more vital in order to build houses safely. Turning to
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
my opinion regarding the matter, I have three reasons for my substantiation.
Firstly
, oxygen is more influential than
house
Add an article
a house
the house
show examples
, If the government makes a decision to plant trees,
instead
 of buildings or squares,
this
 will be beneficial for all members of society, as they can enjoy the beauty of nature and relax.
Secondly
, If we will start to plant trees, we have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 possibility to do
a wood
Remove the article
wood
a block of wood
a plank of wood
show examples
.
For instance
, we may sell
this
 wood
foreign
Change preposition
to foreign
show examples
 countries and make money.
Finally
, urban greening might help improve air quality and cool cities on hot summer days. Hopefully, these arguments suffice to prove my rectitude. On the basis of everything that has been articulated, I can confidently express my agreement with the statement albeit the
skepticism
Change the spelling
scepticism
show examples
 of some.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: