These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #move #area #adults #development

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Undoubtedly, a large group of people have been moving to others nations each year in search to find out better places to create their families.

Thus

Linking Words

, many of them love their countries

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and would be crucial to follow

this

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way. I'm going to put my point of view in and discuss both sides.

Firstly

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, globalization has made people worldwide see the best kinds of stuff there are in other societies.

For instance

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, Brazil is the richest country in South America where is possible to find out everything for living without needing any nation to provide basic necessities

such

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as water, food, lands and so, our climate is amazing and a large part of our territories are self-productive. So, in my opinion, there is only one reason for it.

Although

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, we have goods most people have been living outside of our wonderful to place it should because of politicians. In fact, they are unable to provide a better condition

life

Use synonyms

for society and it's not

because

Add the preposition

ofbecause

show examples

lack of resources. I'm sure. Until, it is a heavy decision to take, and the advantage is whoever decided to move out will start a new

life

Use synonyms

for their kids and grandchildren, and the disadvantages are the family, friends and history they will take off behind.

Secondly

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, there are others who take

this

Linking Words

decision only because they want to start a new

life

Use synonyms

abroad and is impossible to judge them. Countries

such

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as the USA, Canada, Australia, and so, have an incontestable high level of education. Indeed, students usually figure out good job opportunities after finishing up the courses.

In addition

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, many of them back to their homeland and apply everything they learned studying abroad. In

this

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case, the advantages are so far better than the disadvantages.

Finally

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, there aren't the right decision and individuals have to track what makes them happy. Unfortunately, there aren't

a similar levels

Correct the article-noun agreement

a similar level

similar levels

show examples

of development among countries in the world and some are better than others. In most cases, immigrants are from sub-development places where they are only trying to have another opportunity in

life

Use synonyms

Submitted by murilo.siqueira2012 on Mon Nov 07 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

345 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

metropolitan
migration
globalization
socio-economic factors
traditional norms
cosmopolitan environment
brain drain
assimilation
gentrification
alienation
multiculturalism
infrastructure strain

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These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some feel that governments should prioritize healthcare instead of other important areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people prefer to shop in supermarkets rather than small shops or local markets. Is this positive or negative development? Discuss and give your opinion.

Some people believe that handwriting is no longer useful in the modern world and should not be taught in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. To what extent do you agree or disagree?