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Band 4.5

International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local  inhabitants ant the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?

#tourism #places #time #concern #impact #inhabitants #ant #environment
The international
Correct article usage
International
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 travel has brought indispensable benefits to many towns and cities across the globe. The benefit outcome of the aforementioned concept is globalization and
hike
Correct article usage
a hike
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 in employment opportunities.
However
, the
flipside
Correct your spelling
flip side
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 of the concept is
severe
Add an article
a severe
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 threat to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature. On the
first
 hand , there are myriad advantages
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 international
tourism
industries
Change noun form
industries'
industry's
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 growth. The
first
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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foremost benefit is improvement in globalization,
also
 economic, social, political and cultural spheres of the modern world get high which helps to increase
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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.
Moreover
, major revenue is generated through
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
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 sector which
help
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helps
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 in employment recruitment ,
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
an
Remove the article
apply
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limit unemployment stopped. For an instance,
as per
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
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 survey by GNLU says that 45 % of vacancies had been generated through
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
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 field in India.
Also
 ,
tourism
 field has
upsurge
Wrong verb form
upsurged
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 as compared to past years.
On the other hand
 ,
flipside
Add an article
the flipside
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 of
this
 concept is
severe
Add an article
a severe
show examples
 threat to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature through various
medium
Fix the agreement mistake
mediums
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. Due to the rise in
tourism
Add an article
the tourism
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 sector, infrastructure develops which badly cause the environment.
In addition
, to build premium resorts and infrastructure ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
trees are cut down,
Correct word choice
and
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deforestation occurs.Which affect the local civilian as well as the environment . To quote an example 190 trees had been cut down in
kerala
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Kerala
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 to build a tourist resort.
Likewise
, many other towns and cities are doing the same activities.
Besides
 that soil erosion take place, rise in pollution and
Correct your spelling
many more
manymore
Correct your spelling
many more
 acts take place To conclude, global
tourism
 has brought tremendous benefits to many towns and cities across the world.
Although
 there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
setback
Fix the agreement mistake
setbacks
show examples
in concern .
Hence
, the advantages of
tourism
 industries outweigh the disadvantage.
Submitted by alanbiju394 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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