Some people say that giving a smaller amount of money weekly to children will help them become more capable as they grow older. Do you agree or disagree?

At
first
, I have to admit that I’m not much of a good
advice
giver.
However
, there have been a few occasions when my friends came to me to look for my
advice
. And if I have to choose one of them, I’d like to tell you about a time when a friend of mine asked me about how to lose weight effectively. Back
then
, my friend was a huge fan of fattening food and high-sugar drink and, not surprisingly, he was overnourished
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
make him get exhausted very quickly and lose his concentration easily while studying and working. I understood that he clearly perceived his condition
of
Change preposition
as
show examples
overweight
Add a missing verb
being overweight
show examples
and his main problem was that he could not resist the temptation of eating
such
kinds of food and did have no one to push him up. We have been friends for years, so he came to me to look for my
advice
and I
finally
gave him back with some suggestions that I thought might be helpful for his health.
First
, I encouraged him to take more vigorous exercises to burn excessive calories and saturated fat under his skin. Other than that, I
also
encouraged him to follow a balanced diet by eating more vegetables and fruits. As I remember correctly, after just 2 months following my
advice
, I
finally
reduced
roughly
Change preposition
by roughly
show examples
6 kilograms, a remarkable number that made me really surprised.
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial responsibility
  • independence
  • financial literacy
  • work ethic
  • effort and reward
  • impulsive purchases
  • budgeting skills
  • critical thinking
  • sense of entitlement
  • modest amounts
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