Government invest in the arts such as music and theatre is a waste of money. Government must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

The question
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
where the
Government
should invest funds is debatable. Some believe that investing in entertainment is profitable
however
others suggest that these funds should rather be invested in public
services
.
This
essay will discuss why the
Government
should opt to invest money in public
services
. When a
government
chooses to invest in public
services
it aids a community in numerous ways, making life for
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
citizens easy to adapt to.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
a research paper from the Francis George Institute quoted that after the
government
had
finally
decided to provide a number of buses (20) for The Volin Community, more children were able to attend classes on time.
Furthermore
, health is very vital for life
thus
when the
government
takes the initiative to invest in
this
sector it reduces the need of going abroad to seek better treatments and cuts costs.
For example
due to the high costs of medical expenses, because of health insurance available to each and every
citizens
Change to a singular noun
citizen
show examples
of a country, people tend to spend less money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
their hospital bills. An argument against the
government
investing in public
services
is because of how costly it can be for the
government
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
in remote areas where populations tend to be less in number.
However
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
would argue that regardless of how much it takes the
government
to develop
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
country it is
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
duty to make sure that people have access to basic necessities,
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
name a few: electricity and water. In conclusion, while
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
acknowledge how costly it is for the
government
to invest in areas with relatively low populations, I would argue that those investments not only better life for
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
people but
also
develop the country as a whole.
Submitted by gaybrelljess99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: