People continue to recommit crimes even after being penalized for their wrongdoings. Why do you think this happens? How can crimes be stopped?

It is
Correct your spelling
true
ture
Correct your spelling
true
that some ex-
criminals
will re-offend after serving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
prison sentences. There are multifarious reasons that
contributing
Wrong verb form
contribute
show examples
this
Change preposition
to this
show examples
issue and various measures that could address
this
problem. One of the possible
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
caused
Wrong verb form
causing
show examples
this
issue is that
prisoners
did not
received
Change the verb form
receive
show examples
effective
correctinal
Correct your spelling
correctional
activities. Some offenders choose to join the gang in jail to protect themselves from being bullied by other
prisoners
, and these
criminals
might commit crimes again with gang members after coming out from jail.
Secondly
,
prisoners
who have been jailed for many years can not adapt well
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
the fast-paced modern society, which means they do not have work skills and knowledge that are compatible with the information era. What's more, the majority of
criminals
are unwelcome by their communities, residents are
Correct your spelling
afraid
afriad
Correct your spelling
afraid
of them and
prisoners
are discriminated
by
Change preposition
against by
show examples
people especially when they
hunting
Wrong verb form
hunt
show examples
for jobs. Under
this
situation, some ex-offenders might have the idea that
break
Change the verb form
breaks
show examples
the law again to back to prison where they could get free food and shelter.
However
, there are still some effective ways can tackle
this
problem.
First
of all,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
correctional activities should be upgraded and
prisoners
should be jailed
separetedly
Correct your spelling
separately
separated
in different areas due to different natures of crime, in
this
way the gang issue in jail could be mitigated.
In addition
,
prisoners
should
also
receive vocational education to help them acquire job skills and the prisoner who performed best should be able to introduce to
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
show examples
after being discharged. Meanwhile, modern technology should
also
be brought to
prisoners
with limited time,
such
as mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
and
laptop
Fix the agreement mistake
laptops
show examples
which could help them have
basic
Correct article usage
a basic
show examples
Correct your spelling
understanding
ubderstanding
Correct your spelling
understanding
of the soaring development of technology.
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
Therefor
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
,
criminals
could adapt better after finishing punishment sentences and they might not choose to break the law again. In conclusion, even though there are many contributors cause some
criminals
cannot
rehabilitate
Fix the infinitive
to rehabilitate
show examples
well and recommit crimes, we still get some useful methods
could
Correct pronoun usage
that could
show examples
help to deal with these problems.
Submitted by chenjiani0221 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: