At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

These days, the proportion of
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
generation
in some countries is much
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
higher than older
adults
. There are
prods
Correct your spelling
pros
show examples
and cons to
this
matter.In
this
essay,
i
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I
show examples
will expand
the
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on the
show examples
advantages and disadvantages of
this
consequence.
To begin
with,
according to
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apply
show examples
the latest study that was conducted
in
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at
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Oxford university, revealed that
young
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the young
show examples
population is increasing more and more,
Correct your spelling
especially
especialy
Correct your spelling
especially
in eastern
europe
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Europe
show examples
.
Moreover
,societies can rely on these young
adults
.
For instance
,in Germany, young
people
are engaged
with
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in
show examples
technological tasks and if the
number
of young
people
rises, there will be improvement and progress for the country
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
that specific field. Plus,
with
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in
show examples
comparison to
old
Add an article
the old
show examples
generation
, young
adults
are more flexible to do various jobs.
As a result
, governments can enrich new ideas with the presence of these young generations.
On the other hand
, as the
number
of young
people
increases, there will be more responsibilities for societies and officials. Because
young
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the young
show examples
population are reckless and risk taker
with
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in
show examples
comparison to
old
Correct article usage
the old
show examples
ones.
In addition
,
old
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the old
show examples
generation
are experienced and can be
Correct your spelling
useful
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
for their country.
For Example
, they can teach what they have learned. If the
number
of old
adults
decreases,
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of instructors and mentors
are
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is
show examples
the
consequences
Fix the agreement mistake
consequence
show examples
.
Old
Add an article
The old
show examples
generation
, especially
middle-aged
Correct article usage
the middle-aged
show examples
, can be candidates for political jobs, and preponderant decisions can be taken by them.
However
, old
people
are not up-to-date. They can not easily
adopt
Correct your spelling
adapt
show examples
with
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to
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modern technology. So, by increasing the proportion of
adults
,the speed of progress will be fallen under
this
cirmumestance
Correct your spelling
circumstance
. To sum up, there are positive and negative points in rising the
number
of
young
Add an article
the young
show examples
generation
.In my opinion,the part of positive points
are
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is
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heavier than the opposite part.
Submitted by niloufarhaghighat on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographic
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • innovation
  • skilled labor
  • social development
  • technology
  • dividend
  • competition
  • resources
  • social welfare
  • unrest
  • instability
  • healthcare
  • elderly care
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