Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?
There are controversial perspectives heating up a debate
whether
it is vital for the authority to cash in Change preposition
about whether
health
care and education Correct article usage
the health
system
. While
some claim that spending on both
mentioned facets is essential for the governor, the opposite makes a statement that it is not their accountability. While
each has its own perks, I would contend that it is optimal to combine both
mentioned elements.
Without a shadow of a doubt, the government should invest in medical
Add an article
the medical
system
and schooling. Because everyone knows the significance of the educational system
and the medical care.Moreover
, it can also
enhance the economy for
the country. Change preposition
of
For example
, some nations which have developed economy
Change the noun form
economies
such
as Germany, Netherlands
or the United States, always provide scholarships to abroad students who need a wealth of money to study overseas or give Correct article usage
the Netherlands
health
insurances
to their citizens. Fix the agreement mistake
insurance
Hence
, it is crucial for the authority to pour money into those two backbone industries.
While
the imperativeness of financial investment in education and medical care of the governor is widely acknowledged, they should not purchase entirely for both
mentioned aspects. Because the government’s budget is not enough, they have to spend money on other fields and the residents should pay for it since it will help the settlers to have accountability for revamping their awareness of protecting their health
and maintaining their studying quality. For instance
, some fields such
as constructing facilities, expanding entertainment industries or refining tourism can be cited as compelling examples for
other aspects Change preposition
of
on
which need to be squandered by the Change preposition
apply
authority
. If the governor Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
fund
Correct subject-verb agreement
funds
entire
of it, people who have bad habits which affect directly Correct article usage
the entire
to
their Change preposition
apply
health
or people who drop out of school can also
gain the benefits which is unfair to the
others. Correct article usage
apply
Thus
, the cost from
Change preposition
of
both
mentioned systems should not be purchased completely by the government.
In conclusion, although
the investment in medical
Add an article
the medical
system
and schooling is indispensable for the financial development of a nation, those expenditures should not be funded entirely by national coffer
.Fix the agreement mistake
coffers
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task achievement
Enhance the clarity and specificity of your examples: While you mentioned countries like Germany, the Netherlands, or the United States as examples of financial investment in healthcare and education, providing more detailed and concrete examples would make your argument stronger. Instead of broadly stating that these countries provide scholarships or health insurance, try to offer specific programs, their impacts, and how they support your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical coherence: The essay generally follows a coherent structure but can benefit from tighter logical connections between paragraphs. Use transitional phrases to better link paragraphs and clarify how each part of your argument contributes to your overall stance. This will enhance the reader's ability to follow your reasoning.
task achievement
Address counterarguments more effectively: While you mentioned the viewpoint opposing government funding, exploring this perspective in greater depth and detailing why it may be considered, yet ultimately arguing against it with evidence, would strengthen your overall argument.