Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?

There are controversial perspectives heating up a debate
whether
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
should
Verb problem
apply
show examples
authorities should cover the cost
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the healthcare
system
and schooling or not
?
Change the punctuation
.
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While
some claim that it is necessary for governors to allocate money for the medical
system
and the educational
system
, the opposite makes a statement that
such
things are not held responsible
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
the government. I would contend that lawmakers had better support partially for
such
systems in finance. Without a shadow of a doubt, it is necessary for governors to make an investment in both the medical care and educational
system
.
Since enhancing
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Enhancing
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the quality of
labor
Change the spelling
labour
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and
health
of dwellers
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
in order to foster economic growth in their nation.
For example
, there are a myriad of countries having developing economies
such
as Germany and Dutch polishing the tuition fee or providing scholarships for students and
health
insurances
Fix the agreement mistake
insurance
show examples
for their residents.
Therefore
, Funding 2 backbone industries is essential that the Government ought to conduct.
While
the necessity of supporting financially
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
schooling and
health
systems
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
widely acknowledged, they had not better
allocate
Wrong verb form
allocated
show examples
fully for
2
Correct article usage
the 2
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facets mentioned. The explanation for
this
dire problem is national coffers do not have enough money and they must pay for a flurry of fields.
Moreover
, inhabitants should spend money as they may have more responsibilities and awareness
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
about protecting their
health
and ensuring their study’s quality.
In specific
Rephrase
Specifically
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, constructing infrastructures , thriving tourism and widening the entertainment industry are the compelling instances for alternatives that the authorities need to cash in.
Hence
, The expenditure related to education and
health
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
not of the essence to fully invest the government's fund. In conclusion,
Although
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial support for schooling and
health
care is pivotal for the prosperity of a nation, the mentioned expenses only need to be invested partially by the authorities’ budget.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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Language and Clarity
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Specific Examples
Strengthen your argument with more detailed and specific real-world examples. General references to countries or systems are good, but adding concrete statistics or case studies can greatly enhance your argument's persuasiveness.
Balanced Discussion
Ensure a balanced discussion by evenly addressing counter-arguments. You've made a good start, but expanding on these perspectives with more detail can enrich your essay.
Grammar and Accuracy
Mind the proper use of articles ('the', 'a', 'an') and prepositions ('in', 'for'). These small errors can disrupt the flow of your essay and make it harder for the reader to understand.
Cohesion and Coherence
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental human rights
  • boosts the country's economy
  • productivity
  • public funding
  • equality and accessibility
  • socio-economic status
  • privatized
  • disparities
  • prioritize
  • people's well-being
  • inefficiencies
  • bureaucratic challenges
  • mixed approach
  • optimize
  • quality
  • availability
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