IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Nowadays many people prefer to seek medical advice on the Internet instead of seeing a qualified doctor. What are the reasons for it? is it a positive or a negative development?

#people #advice #internet #doctor #development
Nowadays people prefer to find solutions to their medical
issues
 on the
Internet
 rather than referring to a
doctor
. One reason for that can be the environment of the
Internet
 which provides all desired
information
 readily for users.
However
, because medical
issues
 are very complicated,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can cause misunderstandings when a nonspecialized person
read
Correct subject-verb agreement
reads
show examples
 them. One causing factor for people’s tendency to seek medical
advice
 on the
Internet
 can be the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
fact that it is convenient. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
words
Add a comma
words,
show examples
 all
information
 relating to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
special medical
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
problems are accessible by a simple search on the
Internet
 within a few minutes.
For example
, consider a person who is suffering from a sore throat.
Instead
 of searching for a
doctor
, making an appointment and waiting until his or her turn; they can easily sit on their sofa, bring their cell phone and seek medical
advice
 online.
Therefore
,
this
 person prefers seeking
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
medical
advice
 on the
Internet
 rather than referring to a
doctor
.
Although
 all the needed
information
 can be accessed from some sites on the
Internet
, getting medical
advice
 from these sites might have bad consequences, because of misunderstandings. By that I mean,
because
Correct word choice
that because
show examples
 medical
issues
 and the methods of dealing with them
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 are complicated; nonspecialized people might not understand them properly.
As a result
, they might do something which is not good for their health. In conclusion,
although
 using the
internet
 makes it possible to access all
information
 and
advice
 required for medical
issues
, sometimes ordinary people can not understand them very well, resulting in using them in a hazardous way.
By
Change preposition
From
show examples
this
view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
,
this
 trend is negative. To solve
this
 problem, individuals can use valid sites which can help them to increase their medical knowledge.
However
, it is better to consult with a
doctor
 before using a special medicine or implementing a special method of dealing with the disease.
Therefore
, the bad consequences of misunderstandings would be prevented.
Submitted by mohammad.etemad128 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: