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Band 5

With increasing populations and ever-growing urban centers, many countries are losing their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protecting places of natural beauty? How can this be solved.

#populations #centers #countries #beauty #spots #places #be
Due to a sharp rise
of
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in
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population
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the population
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 all over the
world
Add a comma
,world
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 it leads to huge development rapidly in many
countries
. And there are
also
changing
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changes
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 in land management,
government
 have to transform some natural resource for
people
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people's
show examples
 accommodation and economic growth in these
areas
.
First
 of all, natural
resource
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resources
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,
for instance
,
forest
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forests
show examples
,
water
Correct word choice
and water
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 bodies in
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the city
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city
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cities
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should be protected by everyone because these are
common
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a common
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resource
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resources
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 for everybody in the
countries
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country
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especially
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,especially
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 for citizens in
same
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the same
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 area. Because
ecosystem
Correct article usage
the ecosystem
show examples
 around their space could reflect how good of their life quality
.
Add a missing verb
is.
show examples
 If cities are full
off
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of
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 many resources, dwellers will find
their
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a
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 way to use and add
value
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the value
a value
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of
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to
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 all materials. And it can be their career to earn more money too. Another reason is beauty spots in town could become a landmark and support
tourism
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the tourism
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 industry in
countries
moreover
 it
also
 rise up employment rate in
cites
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cities
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. There are many
measure
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measures
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 that can apply to protect interesting places.
However
, it is clear that we should use
naturally
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natural
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 solutions to prevent
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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from
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apply
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biodiversity loss if we treat them like a tourist
spot
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spots
show examples
.
Firstly
,
government
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the government
show examples
 should increase more protected
areas
 and some activities should be banned in
protect
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protected
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areas
 ,
for example
, hunting, fishing ,
making
Correct word choice
and making
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 loud noise at night.
Secondly
, after we have protected
areas
 and
launch
Wrong verb form
launched
show examples
 some
rule
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rules
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 for
travelers
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travellers
show examples
government
 sector
such
 as
forest
Correct article usage
the forest
show examples
 department should
limited
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limit
show examples
 the number of
tourist
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tourists
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 per day and the time for
Add an article
an open
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open
Replace the word
opening
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 or
close
Replace the word
closing
show examples
 natural
spot
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spots
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in
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during
show examples
 some
period
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periods
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 of
year
Add an article
the year
a year
show examples
. By doing
this
 even
a
Correct word choice
though a
show examples
lot of people be around
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
 the ecosystem still healthy. In conclusion, conservation protect
areas
 should be prioritized as
main
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the main
show examples
 issue of society with effective solutions from
government
 act about protected
areas
. Because of economic growth in
countries
, improvement in living for people, and biodiversity in
areas
.
Submitted by pnchanikan on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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