IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Some people believe that the activities of large multinational corporations mostly benefit the economies of developing countries. Other people take the opposite view and feel that the large multinationals are generally harmful. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #activities #corporations #benefit #economies #countries #multinationals
The graph illustrates the comparison of the
number
 of
people
 (measured in thousand) who visited two new
music
 websites within fifteen days. Overall, a significant
number
 of
people
 paid a visit to the
music
 choice
website
 than did to the
pop
parade
website
. From the graph, it is clear that the
music
 choice webpage was the most popular
website
 among
people
, recording approximately 120,000 on the
first
day
 but decreased steadily on the
third
day
,
in contrast
, those who used the
pop
parade
website
 was almost 40,000 on the
first
day
,
however
, the
number
 decreased sharply to a half of
this
 figure and rose dramatically to twofold on the
third
day
. There was a downward trend in the
number
 of
people
 who visited the
music
 choice from the
third
day
 through to the seventh
day
, whereas the
number
 of visitors increased slowly on the
pop
parade
website
. The
pop
parade
 site saw an upward trend in the subsequent days till the fourteenth
day
 when it plunged from just above 120,000
people
 to about 75,000 folks on the fifteenth
day
.
Nonetheless
, there were
statistic
Replace the word
statistical
show examples
 fluctuations among the population who used the
music
 preferred
website
, it decreased significantly
then
 rose sharply on the 13th
day
 and by the fifteenth
day
, the figure increased to approximately 170,000
people
.
Submitted by augesta7 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: