IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

some people think that it is wrong to keep pets at home. do you agree or disagree

#people #pets #home
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Some individuals believe that criminal
description
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descriptions
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 should not be shown
on
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in
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newspaper
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newspapers
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 and television deeply because
this
Linking Words
 sort of
information
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 has
negative
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a negative
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 impact.
This
Linking Words
 essay agrees with
this
Linking Words
 statement, as
children
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 have access to the
internet
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 nowadays and it can lead to some psychological problems. There is
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
an internet
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 connection or
TV
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 almost
at
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apply
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every home and everyone uses it properly in their lives. Even, sometimes parents give phones to their babies for playing games.
In addition
Linking Words
, kids
watching
Wrong verb form
watch
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 some
TV
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 shows or news with their parents at night.
Although
Linking Words
 parents talk to their
children
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 about using
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internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 in a good way, youth could see some criminal incidents on these platforms. And it would be harmful
for
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to
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children
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 to see
Linking Words
this kind
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these kinds
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 of
scenes
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scene
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for
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in
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 their future life.
Other
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Another
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 reason is that
to watch
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watching
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 or reading
this
Linking Words
 type of
information
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 on
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internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 could cause psychological issues.
First
Linking Words
 of all, people who have medical problems could be affected
from
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by
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 these views.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, looking at or reading so much
information
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 about
murdering
Wrong verb form
murder
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 impact people’s daily life negatively.
The
Correct article usage
A
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 recent study found that there is
growth
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growing
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 number of patients who apply
doctors
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to doctors
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. Most of them are afraid of
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
murdering videos or
horrible
Replace the word
horror
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 movies on
TV
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. In my opinion, people should not be allowed to watch these movies. In conclusion, as
children
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 use
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internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 widely in today’s world and criminal scenes affect people’s health in a bad way, I agree that
this
Linking Words
 kind of
information
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 should
restricted
Change the verb form
be restricted
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 on
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and
TV
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by manqanat1 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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