Directors of large organizations receive much higher salaries than ordinary workers. Some think it is necessary while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In an organization, there are various positions and each position has a defined range of salary depending upon the intensity of the work.
While
some people find the notion to be justified, others oppose it. This
essay will aim to discuss both viewpoints before giving a final opinion.
To begin
with, there are several factors why some senior personnel, such
as directors, are given higher remuneration than other staff. Firstly
, they have years of experience under their belt which is extremely beneficial to the company. Secondly
, they have the skill set required to accomplish the wide range of responsibility
assigned to them which might vary from organizing teams to collaborating with stakeholders to implementing strategies that will raise the company’s profit. Fix the agreement mistake
responsibilities
Consequently
, to handle these factors, they not only have to work within the company but also
travel to various places. Thus
, paying them a higher salary is perfectly acceptable and reasonable.
However
, some employees, such
as managers or engineers, have a workload similar to the higher personnel, if not more. For instance
, a construction engineer has to frequently visit sites to ensure that tasks are carried out according to
plans and conduct meetings with the stakeholders to constantly update them on the progress. This
aids in delivering the project on time as well as
maintaining a good rapport with the client. Therefore
, it seems unfair if these personnel are paid lower wages despite the efforts they make.
To recapitulate, although
the directors work hard to maintain the clients and enhance the profits for the company, many staff also
make efforts to manage their duty
Fix the agreement mistake
duties
as well as
maintain the image of the organization by delivering on time. Hence
, I believe the high pay package for seniors is justified but the salary of hard-working staff ought to be taken into consideration as well.Submitted by rezaf.permadi on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single clear idea to maintain coherence throughout your essay. This approach was effectively employed in your essay, making it easier to follow.
Coherence & Cohesion
It's beneficial to include a wider variety of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your essay. This will also contribute to a higher level of cohesion and coherence.
Task Achievement
For an even richer response, you might consider including counter-arguments in your discussion. Acknowledging contrary opinions and refuting them can add depth to your argument.
General
To further refine your essay, consideration should be given to the precision of language. Choosing the most precise words to express your ideas can elevate the clarity of your argument.
Structure
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively framed your argument, which is essential for high-scoring essays.
Content
You successfully discussed both views in a balanced manner, demonstrating an understanding of the essay question and contributing to a high task achievement score.
Content
Your essay included relevant examples, which helped to support your main points and arguments, enhancing the overall clarity and persuasiveness of your essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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