IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that universities should only offer places to young students who receive high marks at school. Others think that universities should offer a place to anyone of any age. Discuss and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #universities #offer #places #students #marks #school #place #anyone #age
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
University
Use synonyms
Education
Use synonyms
 is a step away from everyone's career sheet it is as much important for every
Use synonyms
students
Change to a singular noun
student
show examples
, whatever the age
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
,
university
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 makes you more Explored,
well mannered
Add a hyphen
well-mannered
show examples
 disciplined & for career orientation. Some people have
mind
Correct article usage
a mind
show examples
 setup that
universities
Use synonyms
 should only admit young
students
Use synonyms
 with maximum cutoff
marks
Use synonyms
 criteria for the final proceeding of
admission
Use synonyms
 as
thereadmission
Correct your spelling
the readmission
there admission
readmission
 department thinks about
university
Use synonyms
 placement
Correct your spelling
success
sucess
Correct your spelling
success
,
Linking Words
moreover
Add a comma
,moreover
show examples
 they think that if they give
admission
Use synonyms
 to
scolar
Correct your spelling
scholar
solar
 marked
students
Use synonyms
 only will lead name fame and brand value of
university
Use synonyms
 and value will be increased in Ranking in national and international affairs, some department of Revenue in
university
Use synonyms
 thinks about
good
Add an article
the good
show examples
 placement of
students
Use synonyms
 after qualifying degree in multi National group of companies will increase the relations and earning of
tution
Correct your spelling
tuition
 fee from future
students
Use synonyms
. On
parallel
Add an article
the parallel
show examples
 side some
universities
Use synonyms
 think that there should be minimum & maximum criteria of
marks
Use synonyms
 eligibility for the
admission
Use synonyms
 in
university
Use synonyms
 of any age because
Education
Use synonyms
 Enhancing is right of any student want to study
for example
Linking Words
 a student
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 average
marks
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
then
Linking Words
scolar
Correct your spelling
scholar
 one but have more practical knowledge can have more
sucessful
Correct your spelling
successful
 Job in future even these
universities
Use synonyms
 not only work for revenue or trp Enhancing they believe that more competition low success to
acheive
Correct your spelling
achieve
 between
students
Use synonyms
 less competition will release more success and opportunities as more demand supply can meet. A part of my opinion,
universities
Use synonyms
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 thinks any age or average
marks
Use synonyms
 category
students
Use synonyms
 should have
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
 to get
admission
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
university
Use synonyms
 because of high number
Use synonyms
students
Change preposition
of students
show examples
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
university
Use synonyms
 will Encourage
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
those
students
Use synonyms
 who feel complex to get
admit
Wrong verb form
admitted
show examples
 even more
students
Use synonyms
 in
university
Use synonyms
 more teachers will be appointed as tutor play vital role in
life
Add an article
the life
show examples
 of career building of student, If they have
low
Add an article
a low
show examples
 score in previous
Education
Use synonyms
, so we should give a chance to
students
Use synonyms
 are
Hardworker
Correct your spelling
Hard worker
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
smart
Add an article
a smart
show examples
 worker.
Submitted by singmahesh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic ability
  • rigorous university environment
  • prestige
  • lifelong learning
  • diverse perspectives
  • life experiences
  • resilience
  • unique talents
  • innovation
  • dynamic classroom
  • inclusive classroom
  • mentorship
  • collaborative learning
  • discriminatory
  • access to education
  • equity
  • inclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: