Academic Task 2 As the world becomes technologically advanced, computers are replacing people at more and more jobs. What are some job positions that may be lost because of computers? What are some problems that may result from this situation?

#world #computers #people #jobs #job #positions #situation

Nowadays, technology had developed to an advanced stage where some

job

positions can be exchanged with humans for computers.

This

matter may cause

job

loss for some communities,

also

problems

as a result

that

come

Change the verb form

comes

show examples

within.

Further

explanation will be examined in the essay. The phenomenon related to computers replacing, there are some unsecured career positions which cause

people

to lose their

job

. One of them is

people

who work as cashiers. As the majority of society knows, some department stores that have advanced technology apply self-service to the customers. To illustrate, the Decathlon sports department store lets their customers pay for all the stuff alone at the cashier stop, which has machines that can automatically sum up the total of the payment. Another position loss can occur to

people

who are responsible for accepting and returning tolls ticket to the drivers.

This

may become the highest number of

job

losses in Indonesia because all the highway ticket stops had been replaced by toll ticket machines. To more a clear explanation, only

people

who have e-toll cards that can travel by highway. While advanced in automation still arise, the negative effects

also

cannot be overlooked.

Firstly

people

exchange computers which results in

job

loss.

Therefore

, the unemployed population will increase more and more.

Secondly

people

who at their elderly age may not feel comfortable keeping up with technology.

This

is because they tend to live with other

people

's help, not from any gadget they do not have.

For example

, the elderly may not know how to shop alone at a self-service department store because they are more convenient to interact and ask any question related to the shopping experience to the shop assistant rather than talking with a machine. To conclude, advanced machinery is one development that will always happen worldwide, but the public

also

cannot be overlooked the negative side that may occur.

Submitted by aulia.putri2298 on Mon Nov 28 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

314 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Academic Task 2 As the world becomes technologically advanced, computers are replacing people at more and more jobs. What are some job positions that may be lost because of computers? What are some problems that may result from this situation?

Fully explain your ideas

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

some people say that playing computer games is bad for children in every aspect. Others say that playing computer games can have positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?