Some say the purpose of education is to prepare individuals to be useful to society. Others say the purpose of education is to help people achieve personal ambitions. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

Some
people
think that
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
aim of education is
prepare
Change the verb form
to prepare
preparing
show examples
youth to be useful to
society
, while others say it is just for achieving personal
ambitions
.
Although
educational
Replace the word
education
show examples
people
can be beneficial for
society
, in my opinion, individuals should
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
study for their own
ambitions
. On the one hand, it is believed that
purpose
Correct article usage
the purpose
show examples
of education is helping
society
for creating
strong
Add an article
a strong
show examples
community. It can be related to patriotism
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because governments and some
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
of
society
believe that individuals should
be work
Change the verb form
be working
show examples
and
trying
Wrong verb form
try
show examples
to help their own
countries
after graduation.
People
who have strong educational
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
can help their
countries
. In many
countries
Add a comma
,countries
show examples
there are some
people
that prepared for
this
purpose. They take children
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
early age
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and raise them.
For example
, there are a lot of military schools in powerful
countries
.
Aim
Correct article usage
The aim
show examples
of these schools is to create powerful soldiers for
army
Add an article
the army
show examples
.
On the other hand
, each person can be personal
ambitions
. While some
people
study hard for
countries
, others may be having different life plans. They can be dreams for moving
Change preposition
to other
show examples
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
, and
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
and
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
there.
For instance
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of college students who want
study
Fix the infinitive
to study
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
European
countries
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
after graduating
their
Change preposition
from their
show examples
schools. I agree with
this
opinion, because
people
could be
ambitions
Replace the word
ambitious
show examples
in life, and they should be free for trying to achieve these goals in today’s world. To sum up,
although
some
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
of
people
believe that education is for preparing
people
to serve their
countries
, I think that its purpose should be helping
people
to achieve their own goals in life.
Submitted by manqanat1 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • contribute to society
  • workforce
  • empower
  • fulfill potential
  • social responsibility
  • individual growth
  • well-rounded approach
  • societal impact
  • personal development
  • career prospects
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