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Band 5.5

Although families have influence on a children’s development, factors outside the home play a bigger part in their lives nowadays. To what extent do you agree oisagree?

#families #influence #children’s #development #factors #home #part #lives #oisagree
These days, growing up as a child has more
impact
 from aspects outside the family.
Children
 having more a sociale live beside school.
Also
 the world is bigger
then
 school and home for them because the use of
internet
. I completely agree that
children
 having more people guiding them because their spend more time outside the house. I
also
 believe that the social media having
impact
 on
children
.
Firstly
,
children
 having a busy schedule beside going to school. By doing outside activities,
children
 get in contact with others.
For example
: going to a soccer club. By going to a soccer club the
children
 having practice 3 times a week and a game in the weekend. That means more than 6 hours outside the house with other kids and coaches.
Secondly
, the
internet
 has a big
impact
 on
children
. They get a lot of information from there what has an effect on them.
For example
: by playing video games or using social media. It seems that
children
 very sensitive for what they learn from the
internet
.
This
 has an big
impact
 on their state of mind and can have a negative
impact
 on them. In conclusion, as a parent you have still some controle in the development on your
children
 but there are other factors to consider. Especially, the use of
internet
 has big
impact
 on
children
.
Submitted by annemariebloemberg on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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