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Band 5.5

Although families have influence on a children’s development, factors outside the home play a bigger part in their lives nowadays. To what extent do you agree oisagree?

#families #influence #children’s #development #factors #home #part #lives #oisagree
These days, growing up as a child has more
impact
 from aspects outside the family.
Children
 having more a sociale live beside school.
Also
 the world is bigger
then
 school and home for them because the use of
internet
. I completely agree that
children
 having more people guiding them because their spend more time outside the house. I
also
 believe that the social media having
impact
 on
children
.
Firstly
,
children
 having a busy schedule beside going to school. By doing outside activities,
children
 get in contact with others.
For example
: going to a soccer club. By going to a soccer club the
children
 having practice 3 times a week and a game in the weekend. That means more than 6 hours outside the house with other kids and coaches.
Secondly
, the
internet
 has a big
impact
 on
children
. They get a lot of information from there what has an effect on them.
For example
: by playing video games or using social media. It seems that
children
 very sensitive for what they learn from the
internet
.
This
 has an big
impact
 on their state of mind and can have a negative
impact
 on them. In conclusion, as a parent you have still some controle in the development on your
children
 but there are other factors to consider. Especially, the use of
internet
 has big
impact
 on
children
.
Submitted by annemariebloemberg on

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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