Directors of organizations receive higher salaries than the ordinary worker, some people think it is necessary while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Directors
of organizations
gets
Change the verb form
get
show examples
more
compensations
Fix the agreement mistake
compensation
show examples
and money for their
work
. It is supported by some
people
as it is the result of their hard
work
, while some
people
considers
Change the verb form
consider
show examples
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
show examples
unfair as it harms the equality of the organization. In my opinion, it is obviously necessary for
directors
to get paid more than ordinary
workers
. For the
people
who
supports
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support
show examples
this
,
directors
spent more time on their career, so they have more
experiences
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experience
show examples
and
knowledges
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knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
than the other
workers
. So, it is the result of
directors'
Correct article usage
the directors'
show examples
hard
work
to take the position.
Also
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,Also
show examples
directors
must take more
responsibilities
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responsibility
show examples
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
the decisions and directions they make. In
this
point of view, they have to do more than what normal
workers
do at
work
, so it is necessary for them to receive more salary. For the
people
who
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
not
supports
Change the verb form
support
show examples
this
, it is thought that
directors
break the equality of the organization by receiving more salaries. They look for
Correct your spelling
equal
eqaul
Correct your spelling
equal
culture and compensation for the organization.
Also
,
usually
Add a comma
,usually
show examples
normal
workers
spend more time doing actual
work
and it gets more intense sometimes. For these reasons, they insist
directors
should receive
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
or similar salaries
from
Change preposition
as
show examples
normal
workers
. From my point of view,
directors
obviously
has
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have
show examples
to receive
higher
Add an article
a higher
show examples
salary. From
experiences
Correct article usage
the experiences
show examples
and know-how
directors
have, the future of the business could change. It's
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
responsibility for them to bear. So it must be compensated by money.
Also
, if they receive more money, it will become
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
motivation for other
workers
to
work
harder so that they can be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
great
director
Fix the agreement mistake
directors
show examples
some time
Replace the word
sometime
show examples
in the future.
For example
, if
directors
get paid
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
other ordinary
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
and have more responsibilities, it is less likely to take
this
position for
people
. In conclusion, in
this
Correct your spelling
modern
mordern
Correct your spelling
modern
society, it is natural for
people
to receive better compensation according to their position and responsibility. So, even though there are some
Correct your spelling
controversial
controversies
controversials
Correct your spelling
controversies
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think it's necessary for
directors
to get paid better than the other normal
workers
.
Submitted by kwoneunji225 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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