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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

University education should be free for all students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#university #education #students
It is thought that
fees
 for
university
 education should be paid by the government
instead
 of by students. I totally disagree with
this
 idea, as I believe that tuition
fees
 will be a burden on government coffers, which are used to develop countries. Proponents of
such
 a policy may claim that when every
University
 student is entitled to the right to attend
University
 without any
fees
, they may stand a better chance of getting a decent job because they are educated and qualified.
However
, the fact is that the flux of graduates equates with a more competitive job market where many bachelor’s degree holders compete for a vacancy.
This
 leads to chaos in the labour market
due to
 overqualification or changes in recruitment requirements.
Therefore
, they may prioritize other aspects
such
 as soft skills and work experience.
As a result
, it is not ideal to offer free
university
 education. Looking from an economic perspective, without any tuition
fees
, which will reduce revenues among universities, there could be insufficient budgets for learning development, including salaries for teaching staff and investments in technological equipment.
As a result
, teaching quality may be negatively affected. Teaching staff,
for example
, may be demotivated to devote themselves and endeavour to have the best teaching outcomes when they are not being well paid.
Additionally
, waiving
academy
Correct article usage
the academy
show examples
 training bill puts a strain on authority coffers, especially in developing countries. Consequences, it might possibly give rise to temporary budget deficits, tax hikes or reduced public welfare. In conclusion,
while
 it may be a good idea to allow all students to go to
academy
Add an article
the academy
show examples
 without any payment, it is almost certainly not the best for
politics
Replace the word
political
show examples
 coffers in terms of growing the country.
Submitted by tinhthien30 on

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task response
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and presents relevant arguments. However, ensure that you directly address the prompt and provide a balanced view on both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
You have structured your essay logically with clear support for your arguments. Work on improving the introduction and conclusion to provide a stronger framework for your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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