IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

The internet has a bigger impact on people’s lives because it is more popular than television. Do you age or disagree?

#internet #impact #people’s #lives #television #age
Currently
Add a comma
,Currently
show examples
 the
internet
 is becoming a golden standard
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 people around the world. I agree that social networking has a strong effect on everyone's life
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 since it is getting widespread and more convenient to use. It is known that the 21st century is a golden age of virtual reality and technologies.
The technology
Correct article usage
Technology
show examples
 is evolving day by day and the advantages of networking
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 increasing.
Therefore
, everyone uses
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 even children and elders. Since social
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
medias
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been widespread, it impacts
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people's lives, Everyone has an account on social media and they check the news,
watch
Correct word choice
and watch
show examples
Correct your spelling
different
difterent
Correct your spelling
different
 videos on it every day.
That is
 why
Correct article usage
The internet
show examples
internet
Change the capitalization
Internet
show examples
 is being more popular and
Correct your spelling
effective
show examples
affective
Correct your spelling
effective
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 human beings. As I said before, there are
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of advantages of
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
. One of the main benefits of social networking is its convenience. With just a click viewers of
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 can carry out various operations like sharing and watching videos, posts and doing shopping.
For example
, nowadays there are many bloggers who
posts
Change the verb form
post
show examples
 about news or even their personal lives. Subscribers are being in
know
Add an article
the know
show examples
 of everything because they just followed many channels. To sum up, networking is
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
influential due to its advantages
such
 as convenience and popularity.
Submitted by bekeyeva_a on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: