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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can is better for their overall skills development and creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree?

#activity #child #skills #development #creativity
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Doing an entertaining activity in
a
Correct article usage
the
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 company of
Use synonyms
child
Correct article usage
a child
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 can bring him more joy, development and creative skills than reading.
This
Linking Words
 topic can be discussed in both positive and negative ways, but
at
Change preposition
from
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 my perspective, doing something that you enjoy really makes you more pleased and evolve
kid's
Fix the agreement mistake
kids'
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 creativity and makes up their minds. One of the obvious instances is a
child
Use synonyms
 that loves drawing or sculpting and has
a
Remove the article
apply
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talent, but
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
his parents
her parents
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 force him to read,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 makes him less confident in his interests and unsure about his own hobbies. All a
child
Use synonyms
 needs is support from his parents to keep working hard on what he relishes doing,
hence
Linking Words
 he'll make something really big and entertaining out of it.
However
Linking Words
, reading is
also
Linking Words
 very good for a developing little soul and it is amazing if
Use synonyms
child
Add an article
a child
the child
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 loves reading, won't be a problem if a kid didn't like it, but reading really helps to set up
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
show examples
 mind and form his personality. Reading
also
Linking Words
 replenishes vocabulary, so
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
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also
Linking Words
 one of
creative
Correct article usage
the creative
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 activities, that can be a reason
of
Change preposition
for
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 a kid's joy and happiness. But I'm mostly inclined to the fact that children should do whatever they want, not something they are forced to do.
Submitted by argyn-34 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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