Today, many people use the internet and smartphones to transfer money to friends, family, and businesses, is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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most individuals prefer to use the internet and smartphones to
transfer
Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
to friends, family, as well as businesses. Do you think it is positive or negative development? And why? There is no doubt that there is any kind of benefit
Use synonyms
transfer
Fix the infinitive
to transfer
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money
Use synonyms
through
the
Correct article usage
apply
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social media and it is one of the greatest
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
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to
transfer
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money
Use synonyms
in order to save more time.
In addition
Linking Words
to
Change preposition
apply
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it gives us lots of
chance
Fix the agreement mistake
chances
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such
Linking Words
as if we will buy something from the internet, we can buy
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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some
Remove the redundancy
apply
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products from our house. For
an
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apply
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example: in
the
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apply
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recent
month
Add a comma
,month
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our tutor
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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bought the IELTS course from
in
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apply
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their house through
the
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apply
show examples
social media. To be sure,
this
Linking Words
kind of cash
transfer
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is very dangerous and nowadays, cyber attack
are
Change the verb form
is
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many by hackers
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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is why the majority
Change preposition
of
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people has complained to
government
Add an article
the government
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.
In addition
Linking Words
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
recent
month
Add a comma
,month
show examples
cyber attack has been
US's
Change noun form
US
show examples
bank by hackers and
this
Linking Words
bank
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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lost one billion dollars. In
final
Add an article
the final
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analysis, despite the fact that
transfer
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money
Use synonyms
has significantly become
to
Change preposition
apply
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worldwide and every people had
easily
Change the adverb
easy
show examples
life by it.
Use synonyms
Transfer
Wrong verb form
Transferring
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money
Use synonyms
is a negative development in
Add an article
the
show examples
general cause
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cyber
attack
Fix the agreement mistake
attacks
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can
be occurred
Change to the active voice
occur
show examples
while transferring
a
Correct your spelling
amount
show examples
mount
Correct your spelling
amount
show examples
of
money
Use synonyms
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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